Just breathe
by bliss22
Summary: Beth had escaped the nightmare she was in and reunited with her group. Tara lost everything, but found comfort with Glenn and the others. Watch their paths cross- will Beth ever be the same? Will Tara find something, someone, to live for? Will Daryl's emotions get in the way of his survival? In a world surrounded by death and destruction, is there any room left for love?
1. Chapter 1

Just breathe.

Drip drip drip. The monotonous sound was driving her mad. Beth Greene looked at her reflection for the first time in weeks. The mirror was cracked, distorting her reflection into shapes resembling a fun house mirror. She thought she looked tired, too skinny. The only stomach in the room rumbled deeply. She couldn't remember the last time she had had a proper meal. That then made her wonder whether or not the definition of 'proper meal' had changed since the outbreak.

Small voices whispered on the other side of the only way out. The blonde pressed herself against the wall next to the door. Brick in hand, she stood at the ready. _It's either them or me, _had been her slogan since she had last seen Daryl. "Oh Daryl," she sighed, "If you could see me now." It had been approximately two months since the abduction. Give or take a couple weeks: Beth wasn't even sure what month it was. She had been kept in the dark for the entire duration of her stay. Up until today, she hadn't come in contact with anyone in this place. The voices behind the door faded.

She knew morning had arrived; the sun cast tiny beams of light through the boarded-up windows. She had made a mental note of which way was east. There was a nail sticking out of the boards: she had already used it to cut the rope that bound her hands behind her back. The floor, littered with debris and water, was filthy. It could have been a bathroom. She couldn't call it a bathroom- it had been stripped of all definition. It was sad. A bathroom is thought of as a place of comfort, not a hole in the ground and a leaky sink. Though she wasn't leaking, Beth felt she could relate to this bathroom. She too, had lost her definition. She quickly stood up and paced the room. Carefully sifting through the rubble she found a jagged piece of mirror. Her pale blue eye stared back at her. Using the rope, she cautiously wrapped it around the thickest edge of glass.

"Hello?" An apprehensive voice called from the other side of the door. Beth crept to the door. "Now listen, I don't have to do this. I know you haven't eaten so stand up against the opposite wall and I will open the door and throw in a bag. Don't try anything because I have a weapon. And I'm not afraid to use it." She heard hands fumbling keys around, but nothing else. He didn't have to come, and he most certainly should not have come alone. Beth had a decision to make and only a split second to a make it. The door swung open, she held her breath. A man of small stature leaned into the room. As he threw the bag, Beth plunged the homemade dagger into his throat.


	2. Chapter 2

Beth rolled the dead man over. He had a small knife in a holster on his hip. She unsheathed the knife and shoved it through his forehead. "Thank you, I'm sorry." She whispered while she shut his empty brown eyes. The door creaked as she shut it. She wanted to see if the man had anything else on him. Her stomach reminded her, she wanted to check the contents of the supposed food he threw. It was her intention to do these things uninterrupted by anyone, dead or not. She took off the holster, putting it on her own right thigh.

As perverse as she would have thought, she took the stranger's clothing. The torn fabric she wore around her body had become shredded in most parts. Being the same size as her, his t-shirt and shorts combo fit her just fine. To her delight, she found one piece of mint chewing gum in his pocket but nothing else.

The bag had landed between her and the mirror. Her stomach demanded she rip it open, scattering the contents all over the floor. Beth didn't care. Her mouth couldn't distinguish between the crumbs of dust and the apple. The girl took a moment to silently thank God and ate quickly. Stepping out into the hallway, Beth realized she stood in an abandoned hospital. The weak man stood no chance against her; she doubted he could handle a walker alone. Turning around she discovered a staircase. "So everyone else must be on the bottom floor." She thought aloud while searching for anything of use among the scattered pieces of rubble.

A window opened in the room next to her. "Stan, you had direct orders from the Captain to leave the girl alone." Beth could see an African American women warning. The woman walked through the room and into the hallway. The door to the bathroom hung wide open. "You just couldn't control yourself could you?" Without hesitation, Beth took another life. Sobs overtook her.

Not because the woman's story just ended, but because at Beth's feet, an angel lay; an angel with automatic weapons. Riot gear- she had seen it once before at the prison. A few hours had passed and the sun flew high in the sky. She felt the weight of the gear on her shoulders. Beth felt weak, but determined. She climbed through the open window. The fire escape creaked under her weight. "Well, no sense of going to the roof unless I want to burn alive." She said taking her first step down the rusty emergency exit. Her eyes became clouded- she couldn't see. The sweat poured down her forehead like the condensation of a cool glass of lemonade on the same hot summer day.

She paused at an open window about half way down. An older voice screeched "I heard something hit the floor I swear!" Some heavy footsteps followed and another voice, this time a man's, "Shut up. Shut up. SHUT UP!" All the commotion in the room allowed her to walk right by. The final descent to the ground ended in a 10 foot drop to the concrete. Rolling with her shoulder forward just like her sister Maggie taught her, she expertly maneuvered herself into a standing position, ready to attack. Instead, she found nothing. Strangely, she stood in a silent alleyway. Two cars sat abandoned, but no walkers in her sight. The first car sat in a heap of twisted metal. She took a quick peek inside but came upon nothing of value. "What's behind curtain number 2?"

Flash- the car that took her the last night she had seen Daryl. She didn't remember until she saw it. A broom handle snapped near her. She could feel the bullet pierce her. Her arm fell limply to her side. Her finger held the trigger down firmly, unloading her clip in the direction of the crack. Ducking behind the car with the cross, she reloaded the gun. Hearing nothing, she sprinted in the direction of the gunfire. "Oh come on, come on. It's my lucky day, right?" She pleaded as she searched the shooter's pockets. She had to get out of there, a set of cold metal keys found her fingers. The dark car with the cross appeared to be the only working vehicle in the alley. She stuck the key into the ignition, and the engine roared to life. Beth couldn't help but thrusting her fist in the air, celebrating the success of her escape.


	3. Chapter 3

"Honey, all my friends told me the beaver lives the same way." Sasha interrupted the younger Tara.

"No, beavers are completely different from gophers" They had been going on like this for some time now. Bob had just died so everyone had tried to keep the mood light around Sasha, especially Tara. The group had taken refuge in a church. Maggie and Glenn snuck off alone together. Rick slept on a pew while Carl played peekaboo with Judith. Tyrese cleaned his knife while watching for any threatening walkers. Carol and Daryl should have been back by now she thought solemnly to herself.

Tara did not think good people existed in this world until she came upon this group. Though she had been coerced and manipulated into the plan to destroy them, the family had still welcomed her with open arms. Others had been a part of this family, too.

Hershel fell victim to the Governor, their unwanted leader. Unbeknownst to her, Hershel wasn't the evil man the Governor painted him to be. The situation was actually reversed. Tara felt personally responsible for his death. She didn't know him but the way everyone talks about him, it's as though he was more saintly than the actual priest they had found at this church. The church held forgiveness in this unforgiving world. In the spirit of forgiveness, Tara had confessed to Maggie that she was a part of the group that killed her father. Maggie must have felt the vibe the church gave off because she too, had forgiven Tara. She had also overheard Daryl telling Rick something about Maggie's sister but she couldn't hear anything else. Poor Maggie. Though Tara knew all of the pain and misery she felt. She had also lost her entire family.

The room took on a black and white movie as the sun began its quick descent over the horizon. Rick had gotten everyone a little gift in spirit of the holidays; he says he saved it for a special occasion. "What's so special about today?" Sasha inquired as Rick broke the seal on a jar of moonshine.

"Well I reckon it's sometime in the beginning of July, so I thought we could celebrate Independence day."

Tara countered, "Do you think they would have fought so hard had they known this would have been the outcome?"

"You get two drinks now Debbie downer. We need a reason to celebrate, don't you rain on my fourth of July parade." Sasha threw the jar back, taking a hefty gulp. "Your turn, T." The alcohol made Tara feel fuzzy. She had begun to feel the effects within moments. There was a strange sort of warmth through her veins. The feeling reminded her of a woman she once loved.

Everyone laughed at Carl's impression of his father. Judith laughed right along with them, eliciting sighs from her audience. Sasha shot up and out of the room. Everyone's eyes watched her leave. With a silent nod to the others, Tara followed.

Tears were following down her face. "I miss him so much, Tara." Tara wrapped her arm around the other and guided her to the sofa. "I know sweetie," Tara made circles with her hand on Sasha's back. "I can tell you though; it does get easier with time. It's not that you miss them less. Believe me; I miss them even more now. Your heart will heal, it takes time." Quiet cries left Tara as she put her face in her hands. Tears left her eyes. She hadn't realized she was crying. They sat together for a long time. Tara opened her eyes. She could hear Rick's voice coming from the main chapel. He and Abraham were having a heated discussion. They were knelt together, whispering and making dramatic hand gestures.

Tara coughed and announced herself. "Is the party over already?" She joked. "What's up guys?"

"Abraham fixed the bus."

"Oh." She said, "when are we heading out?" Abraham remained silent. Rick continued, "Well, Abraham wants to leave tomorrow, but I want y'all to stay one more day and leave in the middle of the night tomorrow."

"What do you think Abraham? It would be nice to say goodbye." He rolled his eyes. "there ain't no sense in arguin' is there?"

"Nope." Tara grinned. She went back to Sasha and settled herself into a comfortable position on the sofa. After thanking fate for another day, Tara shut her eyes and drifted off to sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

A knocking noise woke her. Darkness surrounded her, she struggled to see. She had woken Sasha up and reached the chapel just in time to see three people walk in- two returning, and one she didn't recognize. Tara could see Carol and Daryl had made their way back. She was happy as she hustled over to where everyone stood. She did not know the new comer.

Rick turned to her and demanded she go get Maggie in the attic. "Go!" He shouted. Beth- the stranger is Beth. Why else would Rick demand that she go retrieve Maggie? She pulled the ladder down from the ceiling and coughed. "Glenn? Maggie? You guys up here?" The pair had rid the attic of cobwebs but to Tara, it still had a major creep factor. Glenn appeared first, shirtless in her flashlight beam. "Rick needs Maggie. Carol and Daryl are back." By the time she had finished her sentence the two had bust down the ladder and towards the chapel. Tara caught up.

Maggie fell into a heap onto the smaller girl, wails left them both. Tara had never seen Daryl smile. It made her uneasy. Beth stood up, dropping her arms to her sides. Pale blue eyes found Tara- knocking the air from her lungs.

Beth's face contorted with rage upon seeing Tara. "You!" She pushed Maggie to the side and rushed in Tara's direction. Glenn and Maggie seized Beth's shoulders, stopping her in place. Tara fell to her knees. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I didn't know! I swear I didn't know!" Beth howled obscenities at the fallen girl.

Maggie tried to intervene. "He manipulated them, they would have died, they had no other choice." Beth couldn't hear Maggie's pleas over the rushing blood in her ears. A hand on each of her shoulders, Rick lowered himself to be eye to eye. His breath tickled her nose. "Now listen Beth, she's telling the truth. Go with Maggie and Carol and get yourself cleaned up and fed. Rest and we can talk some more in the morning." Beth nodded and retreated with Maggie and Carol.

Tara could not stop thinking about Beth's eyes- blue, but the kind of pale blue that can be found among the breaking waves on a rocky coast. They held the deepest depth of the ocean, far and desolate. She had a dream that she was lying on the beach. The great waves fell upon the shore and swept her out to sea.


	5. Chapter 5

She needed food. There isn't any food here, she knew this fact. She looked anyways. Beth crawled on the floor, pushing jagged pieces of concrete over searching for food. Nothing. She knew there was nothing but she looked anyways. She kept looking. Her eyes shut.

They opened. I need food, she thought. She turned a cinderblock over. Nothing. She knew this as fact. Her eyes closed. A scuffling noise filled the room. Beth opened her eyes. A walker's hand touched her. She opened her mouth and let out a piercing cry. Her arms wouldn't move. Her arms couldn't move. She looked to her midsection to see the undead man teeth's clenching down on her abdomen. The hole in her stomach filled with red. She screamed. Her mouth opened but she didn't hear anything.

"Beth, wake up, wake up!" Maggie was shaking her. She opened her eyes. Tears ran down Maggie's face as Beth sat up in bed. "I need food. My stomach- my stomach is dying." A can appeared. Someone handed her a spoon. Her taste buds had no recollection. "What is this? She said between bites. Maggie answered, "Beans."

"Do I like beans?"

Worry had spread across Maggie's face. "I don't remember either." Beth gave the empty can back to Maggie. A flickering candle cast dancing shadows on the walls. She looked Beth up and down. Beth followed her eyes. Comparing herself to Maggie, Beth looked as though she belonged on Death's doorstep. Maggie's eyes found hers again. "How long was I gone?"

"A while."

"How longs a while?" Beth needed to know.

"We don't know exactly. Daryl said about 23 days."

"I was in the dark. I couldn't see outside. I tried counting the drips of the sink but I couldn't. I was so hungry. Even the smallest breath stretched on for all of eternity" She cried.

"What happened, Beth?" She hadn't noticed Glenn hunched over beside Maggie. "It's so fuzzy. I think, I think Daryl and I got separated. Yeah. Walkers separated us. I don't know what happened next. My wrist, it broke. I felt hands around me, carrying me. They said they'd come to take me off to Heaven." Her sobs overtook her.

She shook, "I woke up in Hell." Beth had calmed down enough to finish telling Maggie what happened. "Then next thing I knew, someone took me to another room, an abandoned bathroom." Her heart sunk. "I killed two people. One of them brought me food. I had to. I hadn't eaten since the night with Daryl- I had to get out of there." She looked at Maggie. "I'm a monster." Maggie held her in a tight embrace. "No, no, no. You're not a monster Beth. You did what you had to do to survive."


	6. Chapter 6

The ocean had found Tara again after lunch. Beth sat down causing Tara to leap in surprise. "Sorry about last night."

"I was going to tell you, just so you know. I told Maggie." She didn't want any bad blood with the blonde. She failed to notice her hair color last night. She hadn't noticed her pale skin either. Maggie and Carol rid Beth's skin of a layer of dirt. The locks reminded her of the sun melting the snow at the beginning of spring-the end of the cold and a sign of warmer things to come. She tucked a blonde strand behind her ear. " …-name?" Tara hadn't been listening.

"Are you sleeping with your eyes open? What's. Your. Name." Smiling, she put her hand on Tara's shoulder. "Sorry, sorry, I am tired."

"That's okay," the other girl said, "Did you want to go to sleep?" Tara rubbed her eyes awaken, "No, no. Stay." She asked where Maggie was. "Oh off somewhere with Glenn, I'm sure. Well. Just listen. I was alone for a long time and everyone is doing other things so I just… I just," Her voice went quiet, "don't want to be alone."

"Okay." They sat still for a long time. Tara could feel Beth's eyes on her. "What are you thinking?" She asked.

"Why are you staring at me?"

"Well why won't you look at me?" Tara turned finding the blue among the beige that surrounded them. "Happy?"

Beth didn't even know this girl. She wanted to. Why did she want that? Beth had decided to walk into this room to apologize. The task complete, she sat there and continued to stare at Tara. Her eyes were brown with green speckles- woods, full of life and something else. She had looked into Maggie's eyes earlier today and was shocked to see pity and sadness look at back at her. Beth had escaped. She made it back alive. She wasn't the same Beth that had been with Daryl that night either. Besides the unapproachable military crew; Tara is the only person that doesn't know Beth. Beth appreciated that. Maggie and Glenn and the others looked at her like she was a victim, a lost puppy with a broken paw.

She could now see the wonder in the brown eyes across from her. It's almost as if they were saying aloud, "Who are you?" She decided to answer. "My name is Beth Greene." She stuck out her hand. Tara took it. "I'm Tara Chambler."

"Well it's nice to meet ya, Tara." And with that the tides had receded back into the bay and Tara was alone once again.


	7. Chapter 7

Rain poured from the Heavens. Tara sat in the bell tower alone. The brass bell sat still, Tara did not. She alternated between standing, sitting, and pacing around the tower. Watch duty had always been stressful for her. She chewed on a loose piece of skin hanging from her cuticle. Tara leaned over the railing of the balcony. From two stories up, she could see grey head stones peeking out from the over grown grass in the cemetery.

A walker groaned. She scanned the grave yard for any sign of movement. He limped right towards the church. She searched for any other walkers around him. Nothing. Tara descended the ladder and made her way into the church. Someone lays a hand upon Tara's shoulder. She frantically found the source.

Beth."What's wrong?"

"There's a walker at the front door."

"Should we wake Rick up?" They both looked at the sleeping sheriff. "No, let him rest, we can take care of this. Are you sure there was just one?" Beth asked.

"Yeah, I'm sure." The girls waited, armed at the front door. Tara grasped the knob. "Ready?" Beth nodded. Tara pushed the door open. Beth followed her. The walker leaned against the wall, grunting. He showed no sign of hearing them approach. Beth fell behind Tara. She turned around, "Beth, do you want me to do this?" She nodded.

Tara held her knife in both hands. She threw all of her weight into the skull of the undead man. Blood shot into Tara's mouth. She spit to the side, "Fucking disgusting." The collapsed wasn't worth searching. Beth spoke, "Thank you. I'm still so weak."

"It's nothing. Let's go back inside." Beth followed Tara back up to the bell tower. They stood side by side, staring out off into the distance.

Beth glanced over to Tara. "What do you miss most?" Tara pondered. "I think I miss feeling safe. Not having to look over your shoulder every second." They both went back to staring. A group of three bats circled around the sky. The stars sparkled bright in the black night. Tara thought maybe there was a perk of no one having electricity. "What do you miss?"

Beth sat down. She put her hand on the space next to her. Tara sat. "I miss being able to assume that people are good." She shook her head. "Those people- whoever they are. They locked me up. For what reason?" Tara spoke up, "Beth what did they do to you?" She cried out. "Nothing… they did nothing." Confusion flashed across Tara's face. "They put me in this dark room. I couldn't see anything. No one came. No one brought food. I hallucinated. Eventually someone brought me to another room. And I escaped." Beth shook with sadness. Tara retrieved a blanket from across the room. She draped the blanket over both of their shoulders. They sat still.

Beth's head slumped unto Tara's shoulder. The scent of rose gardens filled her nostrils. Beth woke up. "Sorry." She stood up and walked to the window.

Someone came up the ladder. "It's my turn to watch." The voice belonged to Carl. Tara approached him. "Only one walker wandered by. Beth and I took care of him."

"Okay. Thanks." Tara retrieved her blanket and made her way back down stairs. Beth rocked on her heels. "Thanks for listening."

"Yeah- no worries."

"I'm gonna go to sleep now." Beth walked off looking over her shoulder as she went. Sleep came fast. She dreamt of a vast forest. She sat still upon the dirt floor. The green canopy became alive before her. Deer galloped by, a smaller version trailing behind. Birds sang beautiful choruses above her. She looked to her left. A rabbit sat with her. For the first time since the apocalypse- Beth Greene had gotten a good night's sleep.


	8. Chapter 8

Daryl, Rick, and Carol had hit the jackpot today. Beth heard bells and whistles in her head as she looked upon the table. Everyone was gathering. Beth sat between Maggie and Carl. Tara looked at her. She sat too far away to talk. Instead, she smiled.

Tara gave a small smile and looked back to her plate. Sweat formed on her brow. She wiped her shirt sleeve across her forehead and stole another glance towards Beth. She didn't get caught this time. Sasha elbowed her. "What's up with that T?"

"I don't know what you're talking about." Sasha raised her eyebrows. "Uhhuh." She dropped the topic until after the feast, as they sat alone in their room. "So you're telling me I imagined you making googly eyes at Beth today?"

"I was not!"

"It's okay if you were ya know, I don't judge, Tara."

She gave in, "Fine. Do you think she noticed?"

Sasha smiled, "T, you couldn't see that when you weren't watching her, she was watching you."

It was Sasha's turn to watch over the church, she left Tara alone. She thought of the way Beth's lips turned up when she smiled. The way she played with her hair when she was nervous. Tara's stomach flipped at the thought. She jumped up and walked. She needed some fresh air. A room off of the side of the main chapel had a broken window, she headed in that direction.

Beth stood with her back to Tara, gazing out of the window. "They're beautiful."

"Yes, beautiful." Tara agreed; admiring an unaware Beth. She turned and stepped towards her, "I couldn't sleep."

"Me neither." Beth looked into Tara's eyes. "I saw you at dinner…" Tara looked away. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Yes you do. I saw you watching me." Tara opened her mouth to speak when the door opened. Maggie came through. "Beth, I need to talk to you." They left the room together.


	9. Chapter 9

Tara hadn't spoken to Beth since that night. She asked Sasha, "Hey, have you seen Beth lately?"

"Um, I don't think so. Why?"

"I haven't seen her in almost a week."

"I'm sure she's fine, why don't you ask Glenn or Maggie?"

Glenn wouldn't ask why she was asking, Tara decided. She waited hours for him to be alone. "Hey Glenn."

He looked surprised she had spoken to him. "Hey."

She said it outright. "Is Beth okay?" Sadness spread across his face. "Yeah, she will be."

"What happened?"

"Well, with her coming home, Abraham didn't stress our departure but he thinks we need to get going. Beth won't go with us." Tara's heart sunk.

"When does he want to leave?"

"Tomorrow."

Maggie wailed into a locked door. Tara thought she looked feral . "Beth, open the door please. Please, Beth!" Maggie tried pushing the door harder. Tara offered, "Do you want me to try?" No answer.

"Beth? It's Tara. I just want to talk." They heard a demand from beyond the door. "Just you, tell her to leave." Maggie shut her heavy eyes. Tara reassured her, "Don't worry, I'll talk to her." Maggie looked grateful. "She's gone Beth." More noises, something heavy moved. The door opened, Tara walked in and shut the door behind her.

"Are you okay?" Beth crumpled to the floor. Tara knelt down and held her. "She's leaving me," Beth sobbed, "How can she just leave?" Tara stroked her hair. "I can't answer that." More tears poured from her blue eyes. "Everyone leaves."

"Did she say who all was going?" Beth's eyes bore into Tara's heart. "Yes."

"I have to go." Tara ran out of the room. She crashed into Abraham as she rounded the corner into his quarters.

"Woah, woah- where's the fire?" He put his hands on Tara's shoulders, steadying her.

"Abraham," Tara gasped, out of breath. She felt like she ran head first into a concrete wall.

"I was meanin' to talk to you anyways kid." He twirled the ends of his moustache, a nervous habit.

Tara nodded. "Listen. Abe, I don't think I can come with you guys." He was puzzled, "Why not?"

"I like it here Abe. Please, I can't leave." His eyes narrowed in realization. "This doesn't have anything to do with Beth, does it?" Tara mumbled quietly, "I don't know what you're talking about." Abraham resigned. He and everyone else could see the chemistry between the two.

"Fine- I'm not going to argue with you." Tara reminded Abraham of his younger sister. He hadn't thought of her in a long time. A single tear left Abraham as Tara thanked him and left the room.

Maggie, Glenn, Abraham, and the others left in the morning. Goodbyes filled the heavy air. Maggie whispered in her ear, her warm breath gave Tara goose bumps. "Take care of Beth for me."

"I will. Did she come say goodbye?"

"No, she didn't." Maggie frowned.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be. She made her decision to stay behind I have to respect that." Glenn gave her a light hug. Abraham wrapped his massive arms around Tara, restricting her airway. "I'm gonna miss ya, kiddo."

"I know, I'll miss you too." He handed her a map. He pointed to a line he drew up Highway 83. "We're gonna stick to this highway as close as we can."

"Okay. Good luck Abe." He nodded. Tara waved until she couldn't see the bus anymore. She looked around her. Carol and Daryl stood fingers interlaced. Rick held Judith with Carl at his side. Tyrese and Sasha stood with her. The priest had even come to say goodbye. He hardly even came out of his office since Beth arrived. Speaking of Beth, she wasn't here but Tara knew where she could find her. Her arms and legs felt heavy as she ascended the ladder. If Beth had heard her come in, Tara didn't know it. She stared out of the window into the night. Tara took a step.

"Who's there? Just leave me alone." Tara remained silent. Beth brought her hands to her weeping face. "Just go…"

"No." Tara's voice came out harsh, her mouth dry as a desert on a hot sunny day.

Beth wanted Carl to leave. She wanted to be left alone. She wanted to die. "Carl. Just go!" Beth's outburst motivated Tara. She reached out and pulled Beth's shoulder around into a hug.

She buried her face into Carl's neck. Beth smelt pine needles. She knew this smell. This wasn't Carl.

She gasped aloud, "Tara..."


	10. Chapter 10

Tara looked her in the eyes. Beth looked down and played with the hem of her shorts. She spoke with a small voice, silent tears emerging from her eyes, "I thought you were leaving…" Tara took a deep breath. "I was planning on going… I changed my mind at the last minute."

"Is that why you left the room so fast the other night?" Tara smiled, "Yes." Beth wanted to know why; but she knew why. She could feel the energy bouncing around them. Goosebumps grew on Tara's arms. Beth licked her lips causing Tara to blush. They sat across from each other, not saying a word, until sundown. Beth's face contorted, she didn't know how to say what she wanted to say. She settled. "I don't know. I'm scared."

Tara came closer, "Why?" Beth shrugged, "I'm not… not gay." Tara laughed. Beth shrunk, offended. "You don't need to laugh."

"Beth, this isn't exactly a society where labels matter anymore. You're either: dead, undead, or alive. We are fortunate enough to be alive. People turned so evil. I didn't think there was any good left in the world. I was sure love and beauty didn't exist…" Tara put her hand on Beth's; causing her to look into the brown eyes, "until I met you."

They laid side by side, fingers intertwined, looking into each other's eyes until almost dawn. Beth jumped out of bed quickly. "I want to show you something." Tara followed her into the chapel. Everyone still asleep, the girls crept passed them. "Where are we going?" Tara whispered.

"It's a surprise." She grabbed a blanket and headed towards the door. "Are you sure about this Beth?" She rolled her eyes her hand on the knob, "Trust me."

The space in front of them looked clear of movement. Beth led her around the corner of the church. A ladder had appeared and with no hesitation Beth ascended. Tara looked up, it appeared the rungs lead to the roof of the church, away from the bell tower. "Come on." Tara obliged trying not to look down. She did anyways, her stomach became woozy. They had both reached the top. Beth sauntered across the roof and laid out the blanket. She sat leaning back on her elbows, ankles crossed. Tara sat Indian style. The sun had broken the horizon. Tara admired the way the golden sun reflected off of Beth's skin. Her hair glowed, a shining halo around her.

Beth turned to her. "You were looking at me at the feast." It wasn't a question, just a fact. "I'm sorry."

"I liked it." Beth held her hand, drawing small circles with her thumb. Tara confessed, "I like looking at you."

Beth smiled, bringing her face closer, "You know I always wondered something…"

"What's that?"

"Close your eyes." Beth observed Tara for a moment, watching the way her cheeks flooded with red. She pressed her lips to Tara's, questioning at first. Tara broke away and looked into Beth's eyes, asking the unspoken question. Beth didn't answer; instead she closed her eyes and placed her lips on Tara's once more. She returned the kiss. Beth's hands had found their way to the soft skin around Tara's waist. She needed to breathe, but she didn't want to. She had felt nothing like this ever in her life. Beth needed Tara, she needed her now.

Tara felt the same need, deep inside of her chest. She felt Beth fumbling around the buttons of her shirt. She needed to breathe. She pulled away, out of breath. Beth's lips discovered her neck. She put her hands on the other girl's shoulders and pushed. "Beth…" Tara said breathless.

"I know, I know. I want to go slow too but I don't think I can control myself." Tara knew how she felt. Tara felt something else too, she couldn't quite put her finger on it until her stomach rumbled- answering her question. They left the roof, but before they went back inside the chapel Beth stopped Tara. "Listen, I really like you, I do…"

"But…?"

"But, I want to wait to tell everyone."

"Any particular reason why?"

"Just trust me, please." Her answer satisfied Tara- though she was certain the happiness on her face would be a dead giveaway.


	11. Chapter 11

The girls had occupied the space vacated by Maggie and Glenn. They had both appreciated the privacy. The attic was only accessible by a ladder, giving them plenty of warning of unwanted visitors. The room held a bed and nothing else. One window hung in the wall, clouded. Beams of light shot through them, reflecting the dust making it look like snow flurries on a winter day. Tara asked, "Do you like the snow?"

"I've never seen the snow…"

"What?! You've never seen snow before? Man, you are missin out." They talked for a long time, only leaving the attic for dinner. Sasha's eyes accused them, but no one else seemed to notice them arriving together. They sat down next to one another at the table. Darryl caught Beth's eyes, but she quickly looked down, stirring her cabbage stew. Rick took a seat to the left of Tara. He spoke, "We're planning a run to a local cabin tomorrow. Its close- shouldn't be too much trouble." The girls nodded. He continued, "I thought it would be best if you two came with us. Beth, you're healed now. It's best you both stay sharp."

"Who else is going?"

"Me, you two, Daryl and Sasha. Ya'll should be ready at dawn." Tyrese's heavy steps could be heard behind them. "Hey, Beth, it's your watch. I'll be up there around 2." Beth drank the remaining broth in her bowl and gathered herself. She put her hand on Tara's, "I'll see you later?"

"Yeah, of course." Beth gave her a gentle squeeze and got out of her chair. Tara smiled at her stew, twirling the pieces around until Sasha sat down in Beth's chair. "What's crackin T?"

"Hey, what's up?"

"I haven't seen you in a couple days, where you been hidin?" Tara couldn't hide her sheepish grin. Sasha's mouth hung open in surprise. "So you n Beth are getting friendly now? I want details. NOW."

"Shh Shh Shh," Tara answered, putting her hand over her friends mouth, "It's a secret. She doesn't want anyone to know just yet."

"Why not? You know no one would care…"

"I don't know Sash, she just asked me to trust her and I do. So shush."

"Fine, but I still want deets- let's take a walk." Their walk ended shortly after it had began in an empty room off of the chapel. "So spill, I want to know, every, single, detail." Tara gushed in excitement. "Okay! Okay!" They sat Indian style across from one another. Tara fought to gain some composure. "The day Maggie left- I went to the watch tower knowing she'd be there. She thought I left, Carl had come to check up on her."

"Did you kiss her? Did you?"

"Let me finish!" Tara continued, "We didn't kiss… yet. We lay in the attic all night, holding hands. At dawn she took me to the top of the church and we watched the sunrise. She asked me to close my eyes; she wanted to see something." Sasha could barely hold in her excitement. "Then, she kissed me. I couldn't breathe. I have never felt anything like it before."

They hugged, Sasha was happy for her best friend. She pried, "Is that it?"

Tara sighed, "Yes that's it, but she tried. I stopped her though. I want to take things slow. Energy like this isn't to be messed around with."

Yelling could be heard from the main chapel. The girls hopped up and rushed out of the door. Everyone gathered below Rick, who had positioned himself on top of a chair. He could be seen above the heads of everyone else, attempting to gain order.

Tara surveyed: Carol, Daryl, and Carl stood closest to Rick. Michonne stayed in the shadows away from the crowd. Tara hadn't seen her in a long time. She looked different. Tyrese sat near them, holding a sleeping Judith. Sasha whispered, "No Gabriel, as usual." Tara nodded.

Rick raised his arms. "Beth just spotted a horde coming our way. There's about 20 of them, headed right towards us. Now we need to take them out, this church isn't strong enough to handle 20 at once. So let's get a move on and cut them off before they get any closer." He then began to separate them into groups, giving instructions as he went. "Carol, Michonne, and Carl- you're with me, we'll take the lead. Daryl, Tara and Sasha stay a ways behind us, to stop any from getting closer. Beth is still in the tower, she has a flash light to signal if she sees anything else. Tyrese- stay here with Judith and Gabriel." Tara noticed Rick had clumped Gabriel in with the baby. At least Judith was cute.

"Grab your weapons, let's move people." Everyone stood up and collected their gear. Rick's group reached the door first. Tara sheathed her hunting knife and stuck her pistol in the back of her pants. She and Sasha held their foreheads together, glaring into each other's eyes. Sasha spoke, "We both come back now, ya hear?" Tara nodded.

The grand wooden door lurched as Rick opened it. They ran through, spotting the mass of walkers one hundred yards down the road. The hairs on the back of Tara's neck stood at attention. A fly buzzed around her head, she could feel the sweat cling to her body as she shooed it away. The air was heavy with humidity. The gravel crunched beneath their feet with every step.

Tara thought of Beth, grateful she had stayed behind in the tower. She wondered if she was watching. She turned towards the tower, hoping that she was. Tara put her hand to her lips, blowing a kiss to the blonde.

The first group had reached the walkers. The dead outnumbered the living. Tara saw a head fly from Michonne's sword. Tara was confident they would kick the walkers' asses, and she'd be back to Beth in no time.


	12. Chapter 12

A note from your author: This is only about half of what I have already written and edited. Thanks for reading.

Beth wanted to be out there helping, not stuck in this damn tower. She paced impatiently. The church door whined in protest to being opened. Four people hustled out. The moonlight glinted off of Michonne's sword. Tara was not with them. They made their way down towards the horde. She followed the road down to the walkers, there were so many. Beth was afraid for her family.

The door groaned again. Three stepped out. Beth spotted Tara fast due to the fact she is neither black nor a man. She watched Tara walk in step with Sasha and Daryl. She admired the way she walked, with certain coolness. Tara's jeans fit tight in all of the right places. Beth fantasized until Tara stopped and turned towards the tower. Was something wrong? Beth didn't know until she saw Tara's hand come to her lips to blow her a kiss.

Yeah something was wrong, neither of them had been able to say goodbye; it would have given their newly founded relationship away to the others.

Commotion began down the road. She found the first four just in time to see a head fly through the air. It couldn't be heard but Beth imagined the thud it made when it hit the ground. Five walkers broke from the pack, past the first group of survivors.

Beth watched with apprehension. Her eyes only saw Tara. She kicked the walker in the chest with the force of a hurricane. He fell to the ground; Tara stood over him and plunged her knife into his skull. He became motionless. Sasha killed her first walker, but struggled with the second. Daryl had already killed his two and rushed forward to help the first group. Tara ran to Sasha, throwing her whole weight into the walker, knocking him to the ground. She straddled him, pinning his arms. Sasha stuck him in the forehead. Beth could see blood squirt all over Tara. Looking through the binoculars, Beth found the first group plus Daryl.

She scanned the area, looking for any more signs of undead. Seeing none, she turned her flashlight on and let it shine. The group acknowledged her signal and retreated back to the church. Beth tripped down the ladder in her haste. She put her hand to her cheek, crimson colored her fingers.

The church door opened and the survivors walked in together, all smiling in their glory. She ran up, "Is everyone okay?" Daryl answered much to her dismay, "Yeah, we're fine." Beth didn't care if he was fine. All she wanted to know was if Tara was fine. A sigh of relief left her when she saw her love walk through the door with Sasha.

Daryl walked to her. "Beth, let's talk." Both Tara and Sasha watched, eyebrows arched in question, as Daryl pulled Beth from the room. Sasha found a rag and wiped the blood from Tara's eyes. "What do you think that's about?"

"I don't know."

"Well you know they were alone for a long time before she got kidnapped…" Tara did not know this but said, "Yeah, I know, she told me?" She did not know why she lied to her best friend. She knew something had happened between them. Tara wasn't the only one that has been watching Beth. She had also noticed Beth hadn't said a word to Daryl since she returned. Tara closed her eyes and let out a breath. "She told me to trust her Sash. If something happened, I have to trust her to tell me." They went their separate ways. Tara cleaned herself up and retired to the attic. Sleep didn't come and she knew it wasn't going to, not until Beth returned.


	13. Chapter 13

Daryl led her to the bell tower. She stood with her arms crossed while he searched his pockets for a lighter. He found one, and lit his cigarette. "You been avoiding me." Beth wouldn't look at him. "No I haven't."

"Don't lie Beth, you haven't said a god damn word to me since you been back." He was right, she had been avoiding him. It was time for Beth to face the music. "Listen Daryl, we were drunk that night and I was lonely."

"Really? That's it? We were drunk? You cannot tell me you didn't feel what I felt too." Tears pushed from Beth's eyes at the harshness of his voice. "We were drunk, that's it Daryl. I'm sorry." He turned and punched the wall.

In this moment, she was scared of him- even more so when he took three large steps towards her. She could feel his ashy breath on her face, "That's bullshit and you fucking know it." There was nothing more she could say- she had made up her mind. "I'm sorry Daryl…" He told her where she could shove her sorry and left the tower. She sank against the wall. Beth cried and remembered the night she and Daryl spent together.

Thunder cracked the skies letting bits of heaven's light shine through. The girl's heart soared, an eagle in flight over mountain peaks. The alcohol rushed through her veins. Warmth spread from her thighs down to her feet. She stood up, invisible ocean waves knocking her aside. Her eyes adjusted to the rotating room. She thought to herself, you never know just how drunk you are- until you stand up. A sideways smile grew across Beth's face.

She found her company laying in the bathtub, singing an old country song to himself. "Daryl." His eyes followed the melodious voice. He loved the way she said his name, "Yeah?"

"Come dance with me." He chuckled, "We don't got no music." She stood over him and let down her hand. "Come on." She said, exaggerating the syllables. He took her hand. Her breath hitched in her chest. She felt something- probably just the alcohol. She blamed quite a few of her recent thoughts on the booze. Daryl didn't.

He and Beth had been alone together for a long time. Beth wasn't the little girl she was when he had met her. Tough experiences can age a person faster than time. She had seen more than her fair share of death and devastation. Daryl wanted to see more of her.

She tugged on his hand. "Let's go!" He got out of the tub. Beth pulled him into a bedroom. She hummed a tune, and danced. Her hips swayed, moving mountains in their wake. He danced too. His hand found the small of her back- fire erupted on the tips of his fingers.

Goosebumps made her shiver. They moved in unison for a while, Beth's humming slowly fading away. She wrapped her arms around his neck. They slow danced. "You need a haircut." She observed, pushing his hair out of his eyes. Rain tap danced on the roof above her, matching the rapid rhythm of her heart. She wanted him. She licked her lips, his eyes lingered.

Lightening struck nearby- thunder cracked a whip up against the house. "I should uh, check it out." He left Beth alone in the bedroom. She sat on the side of the bed and exhaled. Sobriety chased her; she needed to slow it down. She downed the remaining whiskey on the nightstand. The mixture of her passion and the summer night turned the room hot. She asked her sober self permission one last time.

Daryl double checked all of the windows and doors. The thunder drove the walkers wild; they couldn't differentiate between the sound of the weather or potential meals. He paused before reentering the room. Fabric rustled, he peeked around the corner. She didn't face the doorway. He cleared his throat.

She pretended not to hear him. He took hesitant steps in her direction. Beth's adrenaline climbed with every step he took. Her hair's scent filled Daryl's nostrils. He wanted her. His eyes closed, his thoughts went to a bustling meadow. Flowers surrounded him. He left the meadow. Blue eyes pleaded with his. "Daryl…"

His lips crashed against hers. Their mouths moved against one another, their second dance of the evening. His tongue traced her bottom lip. Beth pulled her fingers through his hair, giving a tug of approval. The rich whiskey taste of his tongue made her intoxicated; a level of intoxication unachievable with alcohol.

He cleared the top of the dresser of its contents, glass crashed to the floor. They didn't have to worry about walkers hearing them tonight. He lifted her to the dresser, her hips on either side of him. She ran out of breath. He stayed busy, running his lips up and down her neck. He sank his teeth into her pulse point- a moan escaped her. The dresser creaked in resistance to their dance. He played with the bottom of her shirt while his lips found hers again.

In an instant, both of their shirts sat in a crumpled heap on the floor. The muscles of his arms constricted around her. He effortlessly moved her to the bed. She bit his lip forcefully and decided it was his turn to moan. Beth straddled him, tracing her fingers on his bare chest. She could feel him now. The thought made her dig her fingernails into his skin.

Beth led the dance this time, much to Daryl's dissatisfaction. She couldn't make him wait any more. She couldn't make herself wait anymore. Her fingers found the cold metal of his belt buckle. She kissed him again, sliding her hand between him and the fabric of his boxers. He stiffened beneath her touch. Daryl groaned. He had reached his limits. Beth was no longer in control. He rolled them over, smashing their lips together. His hands fumbled with her pants. She lifted her hips off of the bed, releasing the fabric from her lower half. Daryl kneeled over Beth when the lightning struck- Beth's body lay before him, his for the taking. He laid kisses and bites from her neck to her abdomen. His tongue trailed along her waistline, Beth moaned in anticipation. He nipped at her hip bones and skimmed his hands over her center. "Rip'em off, now." She demanded. Daryl was happy to oblige. He tore away the thin fabric, leaving her exposed. His tongue teased her clit. Beth pulled her fingers through his hair, tugging his face towards her. She couldn't imagine a better feeling in the world. His mouth found hers again. She could taste herself. He held himself above her, positioning himself at her entrance. Her nails dug into his lower back. Ecstasy gushed through her veins. The head board hectically smashed into the wall. Thunder rumbled in the skies while lightning burst through the blonde's veins. A storm had awakened in her- sporadic, there in an instant and gone in the next.


	14. Chapter 14

Chp14 start

Tara closed her eyes but couldn't sleep. Her fingers in her mouth, she bit at the loose skin around her fingernails. She rolled over, restless. With every creak of the foundation of the church Tara turned to the ladder, hoping Beth would emerge. She stood up and paced the room. This energy was too much. She leaned against the wall and did push ups. It was a release for her, and it couldn't hurt to be stronger.

She counted to fifty before she stopped, breathless. Her muscles bulged beneath her shirt. Tara walked over to the end table and lit a candle. She lay on the bed, staring up at the shadows dancing on the ceiling. She closed her eyes. Minutes went by before she heard another sound. She opened her eyes and saw Beth standing at the entrance of the ladder. "Can I come in?"

Tara got out of bed and stood up. Beth took a couple steps towards her. She had been crying. "Are you okay?" Tara asked. Beth sat down on the bed and motioned for Tara to sit next to her.

If Daryl hurt her, Tara would fucking kill him.

"Yeah, I'm okay." Beth paused, looking into Tara's green eyes.

"I have to tell you something…" The blonde confessed. Tara knew this was coming, she wasn't surprised. "Go on…" Beth took a deep breath. "Before I was abducted, Daryl and I were alone… for a long time."

Tara's heart roared with envious rage. "And…?" She just wanted Beth to finish her confession, to get it over with.

"One night, we found an abundance of alcohol. And… and… and we had sex okay? We were drunk and it didn't mean anything to me, but it meant something to him- which is why he wanted to talk to me earlier," She exhaled a deep breath, "I was just so lonely."

Tara considered.

"I told him it meant nothing. He wasn't happy. But that's not my problem." Beth cried. Tara removed the distance between them. She wrapped her strong arms around the blonde. "It's okay Beth. Don't cry, baby." That was the first time Tara called her baby, she liked the way it sounded. Tara spoke, "I figured you had a past, Beth. I do too, not with anyone here, but that doesn't make a difference."

Beth stopped crying. Tara said, "I'm not mad at you." Sad blue eyes looked up at her.

"You mean it Tara?"

"Of course I do. We don't ever have to talk about this again if you don't want." Of course Tara would like to forget Daryl had gotten what she wanted before she did.

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"Being perfect."

"Oh Beth, I'm not perfect, believe me."

"I disagree, you're perfect for me." The blonde leaned in to the other's arms. They kissed until Tara ran out of breath. "We have to be up in a couple hours, love."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah." Beth rolled her eyes and kissed Tara goodnight. She found the comfortable spot in the crook of Tara's shoulder and closed her eyes. Tara placed a delicate kiss on her forehead,

"Goodnight Beth."

"Mhmn, goodnight baby."


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15 start

Dawn came too fast. Tara was exhausted when she woke up. "Beth," She cooed softly, "Baby we got to get up." She shook her gently. Beth opened her eyes. "Fine- I'm up."

Beth stretched her arms above her head. Tara waited by the door. She wanted to ask if they were still keeping their relationship a secret. Whether or not they are in a relationship hasn't be spoken about, so she kept her thoughts to herself. They left the attic together, and Sasha met them.

"Hey ladies, what's crackin?" Tara said, "Hey Sash." They made their way to the chapel, where Rick and Daryl waited. "Mornin ladies, y'all ready to go?" The group left the church. The morning sun shined hot on the black road. Tara wiped her sleeve across her forehead, returning it damp to her side. A deep breath left her lungs; you could practically see the moisture in the air move to the side.

"It's hot." Beth agreed. Tara looked back towards the church; the building had turned to a grain of rice in the distance. Rick announced that three walkers were coming their way from up the road. The lead walker dragged a half eaten leg behind it. The sex of the undead was indistinguishable. Beth skipped ahead of the group. Her foot sank into the dead's chest cavity. It toppled over and she felt a bone rub across her ankle. She lifted her other foot over its head and kicked into its nose. A sickening squish and she pulled herself away. Brown goo covered her tennis shoe. Beth walked back over to Tara, smiling at the discovery of her force. She had been worried she wouldn't be able to defend herself.

"I still got it." She bumped Tara with her elbow. "Yeah, yeah you do." Tara said. Her hand unconsciously reached to Beth's. It lingered for a moment, causing a stir of electricity in both the girl's veins. They heard a huff and turned towards the source. Daryl rushed towards the other two walkers. Rick scrambled behind him, trying to catch up. Tara peered at Beth with suspicion.

"You really think he's over it?" She shrugged her shoulders. Sasha broke the tension, "Let's not get too far behind them." Their feet kicked up gravel as they jogged towards the men. Tara loved the tress in the summer- lush, green, and full of life. Beth couldn't help but fall behind to appreciate the view in her own way. She had no shame as she watched the way her love's pants moved as she jogged. Beth stared until they caught up. A small dirt path went off of the right side of the road. Daryl led, the girls in the middle, and Rick bringing up the rear. Beth's eyes darted around the still woods. A forgotten cabin came into their view. Rick held up a silent hand. No sounds could be heard from the desolate building. Tara concentrated on not tripping up the stairs to the door.

The cabin had been empty of the living for a long time. The door hung open, but no one had ever gone through to ransack it. Rick and Daryl went to work searching the kitchen area. Sasha had gone out of sight.

"Hey, mind giving me a hand?" Tara hunched over the bed, gripping the mattress. Beth grabbed the other end. The mattress tipped towards the ceiling. "Well well well, what do we have here?" Beth shoved her prize into her pocket before anyone, including Tara, could see. Tara picked up a magazine. "Busty Blondes No. 72." Beth made a gagging face and captured the issue from Tara's grasp. She marched right up to Daryl and set the book on the counter top in front of him.

"Go fuck yourself Beth."

"Oh- on the contrary." Tara laughed as she watched Beth stroll back to her. He stormed out of the cabin, lighting a cigarette. Rick instructed everyone to start heading back, satisfied with what they found. They departed, their packs weighing heavy on their backs. The sun boiled the black beneath their feet. Tara thought it was too quiet- foreboding. She shook the ominous feeling off and took Beth's hand. No one crossed their path the entire way back.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16 start

Heat poured from the attic when Tara pulled opened the hatch.

"Whew. Do you want to go somewhere else?" Beth declined, grabbing a rung and hoisted herself through the hole in the ceiling. Tara's jaw dangled while she watched Beth crisscross her arms and pull her shirt over her head. She wrapped the material around her fist and punched through the glass window. Glass fell to the ground and she used her boot to roughly sweep it out of the way. "Aggressive much?"

"It couldn't hurt. It. Is. So. Hot."

"I can just leave ya know, all you have to do is ask."

Beth rolled her eyes. "Ha ha ha." Silence ensued. "Tara- you're staring again." She looked up from Beth's chest. "Yeah, I guess I am." Her heart stirred. "Go sit over on the bed, I have a surprise." Beth said. Tara sat, apprehensive. She wasn't sure if she was ready for this surprise. Her ears heard shuffling across the room, and what sounded like unwrapping plastic. Minutes later she felt Beth's weight plop on the bed next to her. "Open." Beth held a lighter in one hand and a joint in the other.

"Where did you get that?"

"So you smoke then? I was worried."

"I haven't since the outbreak. Oh my goodness! Beth!"

She threw her arms around the blonde, ecstatic. Beth held the paper to Tara's lips and lit the end. Sweet smoke filled her lungs. The gray cloud spewed from her lips as she coughed. Beth put it to her own lips, taking a hearty inhale. The cherry lit up. She held her breath and exhaled through her nose. The smell made her shiver with pleasure.

"Tara, are you religious?"

"Not really, you?"

"Then you should know I used a page of a Bible to roll this, there was nothing else- not even a pop can."

Tara clutched her stomach with laughter. The pot made them giddy. Beth grabbed the plant from Tara's hand. She saw her shiver visibly at the contact. Beth held her eyes, filling her lungs with smoke. She leaned towards Tara. Her eyebrows arched, urging Tara to come closer. Their lips met, and Beth breathed into Tara. Beth could feel Tara's body tremble against hers. They parted and the smoke left her. Beth fell backwards, her hair fanning out on the bed. She gazed at the swirling gray smoke making its way to the ceiling. It had been a long time since she'd been high. Her body felt younger. Stiff muscles succumbed to relaxation. The air smelled of beauty. The layer of sweat on her skin no longer felt uncomfortable. Cool air chilled her shoulder, a mountain breeze. She turned. Tara giggled- her eyes bloodshot. Beth propped herself up on her elbows and laughed.

"Tara, is there any food in here? I'm starvin'." She jumped up and searched the room, concealing her findings behind her back. Beth sat at the edge of the bed.

"Ladies and gentleman, behind door number one," She revealed one bag of sour cream and onion chips.

"Alright- what's behind door number two?" Tara frowned, "Well, there isn't a door number two. Food's getting low." Beth took the chips from her, "This will do just fine." The bag opened with a pop. She reached in for a chip and held it out. Tara ate it in one bite. "Mhm." The chips had disappeared in an instant.

Beth crawled across the bed, her head finding the only pillow. Her heart thumped watching Tara follow her across. The gray shirt Tara wore hung from her chest revealing her pale, intimate skin. Beth felt Tara's eyes on her- she was caught. She felt happy to see Tara smiling, not upset at her intruding eyes. Her red-rimmed eyes shined emerald in the center. Brown tree line arched. "Now who's staring?"


	17. Chapter 17

Tara opened her tired eyes after the sun went down. The girls had laughed until they couldn't stay awake. Her fingers had gone numb- Beth's fingers tightly intertwined with hers. She pried them apart, sighing in relief. Beth stirred, "Mhmn," Tara smiled- Beth was mumbling broken words in her sleep.

She stayed still listening for a while. Her heart skipped a beat; she distinctly heard the mutterings of "Tara" followed closely by the word "Love." She listened more- nothing.

The room became hot, Tara's hands glistening with a layer of nervous sweat. She crept out of bed. All of the moisture in her mouth had migrated to her hands. She needed some water. Tara paused at the opening in the floor. The room was silent, Beth hadn't moved.

The church had an eerie stillness, the air thick with memories. If she had her way, they would not be living in this church right now. Churches were no good in Tara's book. Gabriel, she refused to call him 'Father' for no man of any 'good' God would turn his back on his own congregation.

Tara felt as though he- "Hello Tara." His voice came from behind her. She leaped to the side, "What the fuck?" Her fists were raised.

He stood; his face not visible in the dark space. He raised his hands, open palms facing her. Her fists fell, "Dude, you can't just sneak up on people in the middle of the night like that. Not cool man."

"I didn't mean any harm."

The lie made the hairs on the back of her neck perk up. "I'm going to go now." She walked backwards- not taking her eyes off of him. She put enough distance between them and walked away.

Sasha slept in a room alone. Tara pushed the door opened, "Sasha. Wake up." She sat up instantly, "Where's the fire T?"

"Okay so I was just coming down here to get some water and I felt funny. Gabriel was lurking right by the ladder to the attic. He scared the crap out of me, I almost hit him." Sasha did not interrupt. "So anyways, I said, 'Dude that's not cool' and he was like 'I didn't mean any harm.' I could feel goose bumps everywhere, he was totally lying."

"Weird. How's it going with Beth?" Tara smiled at the mention of the blonde. "Great. Actually before I came down here, she was talking in her sleep."

"Oh do tell…"

"I definitely heard her say my name." Tara couldn't say the other word out loud yet. She didn't know if she loved Beth back. You also can't control your dreams and what you say in them. She hoped Beth loved her.

A shriek rang through the empty church. People scrambling in the main chapel could be heard through the door. Sasha leapt up and grabbed the still sitting Tara. Sasha spoke but Tara couldn't hear her. She could only see her mouth moving. "TARA! LET'S GO!" Tara didn't know where they were supposed to go. "T, Beth's in trouble. Come on!" She pulled her harder. Tara's head cleared, she understood.


	18. Chapter 18

"Hey baby…" Beth smiled lazily. She felt Tara's side of the bed sink with her weight. Her eyes closed and her previous dream continued. She walked along a carnival midway with Tara by her side. The air was thick with delicious fried food. Lights pulsed bright all around her. They came to a halt outside of a funhouse. Tara beckoned her in.

Beth could see reflections of herself. She felt trapped. Her hands slid along the mirrors, feeling for a route out. Her heart hammered, she was trapped. Her reflections changed. Her skin sagged and turned a green hue. Her eyes became black. Tiny drops of blood left her ears. The reflection opened its mouth and let out a low groan. The walker version of Beth's self staggered towards her. "This is just a dream." A hand touched her. Not the walker- someone else. She turned, no one was with her. Beth closed her eyes and made herself wake up.

She opened her eyes, back in the attic now. The hand she had felt in her dream was actually touching her. She was relieved that Tara lay next to her. Beth grabbed her hand, intertwining her fingers. The hand returned a squeeze. Too hard, Beth thought. "Tara, you're hurtin my hand." The hand squeezed harder. She attempted to pull away, but failed. "Seriously, knock it off." Beth's eyes adjusted to the dark. A black mass lay in bed with her, too big to be Tara.

Beth screamed; stained glass windows hummed throughout the church.

"Beth." She pushed herself past the group to the ladder. The hatch opened and Beth fell through head first. She and Tara's heads collided causing an explosion of warm, sticky red. Tara felt her nose break, the pain made her eyes water. Blood poured from her nose into her open mouth. The iron taste made her sick. She cried out in pain, splashing blood on the opposite wall. She remembered Beth, searching her feet for the fallen. Her eyes swelled, limiting her vision. She found Sasha. "Where is she?" Sasha wiped Tara's blood from her face. "She's fine Tara, she's fine. She's with Carol."

Rick waited half way up the ladder. Daryl had his cross bow sights on the hatch. "What? What's going on?" Sasha forced her away, "Let's go get cleaned up." The pain became too much now. She had never broken her nose, boy did it suck. Her purple eyes reduced her vision to slits. Sasha put a wet towel on Tara's forehead. "This is going to hurt Tara. Take a deep breath." She did as instructed. Sasha's fingers pushed the bridge of her nose back into place. Tara shouted a string of curse words and went unconscious.


	19. Chapter 19

Carol found Rick guarding the ladder. "She's awake." They walked through the chapel- Beth laid on one of the remaining pews. Rick knelt next to her, "You alright kid?" Beth could only nod. Her voice had fled the church. "Can we talk?"

Nod.

"Tara's gonna be fine…" Her eyes widened. Tara- she had forgotten. She looked down, her shirt crusted with blood. Not her blood, Tara's blood. "Can I see her?" Rick looked to Carol. She placed her hand tenderly on Beth's, "Sweetie. Can you tell us what he did to you?"

Her lungs gasped for air under one hundred feet under water. She did not want to talk about this right now. She wanted to see Tara. Carol pried, "Did he hurt you?" Tears erupted from her. She flexed her stiff fingers. Beth was not a daft girl- she knew as soon she condemned Gabriel, Rick and Carol would take her to Tara. "He lay in bed with me; I didn't think it was him at first." Not saying who she expected to be in bed with her. "He squeezed my hand. It hurt me so I woke up. I tried to get away but he held on. So I jabbed my thumb into his eye. He let go then," She recalled. "He told me he was going to kill me."

"Did he say why?" Carol asked. Gabriel said there wasn't a place in this world for fags and dykes, only a place for them in Hell. Beth shook her head, "I don't know why he would want to hurt me."

Rick and Carol excused themselves. Beth heard them deliberating on what was to be done. "The answer is obvious Rick- he needs to go. If Maggie were here we wouldn't be having this discussion." Rick huffed, "Hold your horses Carol. Let's think about this for a second." Daryl's voice joined the conversation."I rigged the hatch, he can't get out."

"Let's go take a walk then." Rick said. The vast door groaned and the hall became silent. Beth ran into Sasha first. "Where is she? Is she okay?"

"Woah- take a breath little B. Yeah, follow me."

"Wait Sash," Beth pulled her into a room. "Listen- you know about Tara and I, right?" Sasha flooded from Beth. "When he attacked me he told me he was doing it because of our relationship…" She couldn't tell a stranger that she was gay, she still didn't know herself.

"And if I have to tell Tara what happened because I love her and could never lie to her." Hmn. That was easier to say aloud than she thought. If she could say she loved Tara to Sasha, why couldn't she tell Tara she loved her? "And I'm afraid when I tell her… she'll do something brash."

"Say no more." Sasha wordlessly led Beth to nodded to one another. Sasha turned in the direction of the attic while Beth hesitated. She inhaled, filling her lungs with brave air, and opened the door. Tara lay still on the couch opposite chest rose and fell, she snored. Even her snores sounded painful. Beth sat next to her and held her hand. Her nose- purple and swollen sat in between two black eyes. Her stomach lurched, her hand constricted. Silent tears came. "I love you Tara.I'm so sorry."


	20. Chapter 20

Frost bit the tip of her nose. She felt her ice cold cheeks with equally ice cold fingers. The light blinded her for a moment. Wet drops fell on her bare skin. She was surrounded by glistening white arms crossed as she shivered. The feeling of the cold made her heart warm. It had been a long time since Tara had endured the cold. She missed it.

A pine tree appeared some feet away from her. Rainbow lights twinkled from within the branches. Music played in the background. Jingle Bells, she recognized, turning towards the source. A fire place roared in the corner. A bear skin rug accompanied a soft green loveseat. Laughter rang out from behind the door. She approached the fireplace, sticking out her chilly hands.

"I thought I would find you here," A cool voice whispered in her ear. Beth wore a black dress, her ruby red lipstick complimenting her hair. She smiled, her dazzle having a visible effect on Tara's core motor function. Something made her look up at this moment, Beth too. Mistletoe hung above the fireplace where they were standing. Beth captured Tara's lips. The kiss was short and sweet. "Merry Christmas, Tara."

She licked her lips in remembrance of her dream. Even the small movement made her face throb in pain. Her teeth mashed together, too hard.

" Tara…" Beth whispered. She opened her eyes to the fullest extent. Even then she still could barely see the blonde next to her. "Beth, are you okay?"

She laughed through her tears, "You have a broken nose and two black eyes and you're asking me if I'm okay?"

"Yeah, I guess I am." Tara grinned. Pain shot through her face while anger burned through Beth's heart. She closed her eyes and exhaled. "Does it hurt?"

She nodded. Beth leaned over her. She placed tender kisses on her forehead and each of her cheeks. "Mmm… I feel a little better now." Beth kissed her on the lips. "How bout now?" Tara feigned. "I need kisses, nurse. I'm in a lot of pain."

"Uhuh." Beth kissed her- careful, restricted. Shivers ran down her back. She couldn't wait, but she had to.

"Good things come to those who wait."

Beth did a double take- was Tara a mind reader? "What?"

" - I can't wait to…" Tara couldn't finish the explanation. Two knocks shook the door. "How ya holdin' up T?"

"My face hurts man. It sucks." Sasha nodded to Beth. It was time to go. She turned to the wounded, "Sweetie, I have to go. Just for a minute though, I promise."

"Go where?"

"I'll explain when I get back." Tara grabbed her hand, reluctant. "Please be careful Beth."

"I'll be back soon, don't worry." Beth and Sasha left the room. Her heart was unreachable with the snap of the shutting door. Her open palm rested on the warped wood. She tilted her head. The dark mahogany made her angry. It reminded her of someone.


	21. Chapter 21

"Where is he?"

"He's waiting by the front door."

"What do you mean waiting?" Beth demanded to know. "How else was I gonna get him out of the attic without causing a scene?" Sasha was right. "I told him you didn't want him to die."

Beth felt her blood rushing, her heart racing. Excitement or anticipation she didn't know. Her muscles tingled with power. They reached the front door. Gabriel's eyes darted around the room. Beth exited the church, the others following. "Rick and them are gonna be back any minute. We need to get you outta here, they're going to kill you."

"Why are you doing this?" She stared into his rodent eyes. "Forgiveness is divine, Gabriel." The power overtook her. Cigarette cherries could be seen down the road. She led them the opposite way. Sasha walked close to Gabriel, her gun never swaying. The ground crunched beneath Beth's boots. She could see a lone walker in the distance. Her head turned towards Gabriel. "There's a building up ahead, I stopped there before," she lied. "That's as far as we're takin' you though." Gabriel made a cross on his chest. "May God shine his light upon you. Thank you."

The walker's deep groaning could be heard now. Beth stopped walking and pointed her pistol at Gabriel. "Get on your knees." His eyes grew wide in realization, he wasn't a dumb man. "You liars will burn in Hell for this." Beth smiled at him, "Interlace your fingers on your head." She cocked the gun, "Now." Gabriel begged. "You don't have to do this Beth. It's not too late, the Lord will forgive you." She shoved the gun onto his sweaty forehead. He resorted back to threats. "You bitch!"

Beth swung her arm and connected with the side of his head. He fell to the side, clutching his bleeding ear. Her vision blurred crimson. Wild fire heat spread through her body. Her boot came down on the bridge of his nose. It snapped beneath her. That was for Tara. He spat blood out of her mouth. "Please, have mercy."

The walker accelerated at the commotion, still alone. Gabriel crawled to her feet. "Beth. Please. Help me. You don't have to do this." Blood poured over her legs and boots. He was pathetic. A gold cross shined around his neck. Beth ripped it away from him, and kicked his head away from her in disgust.

The walker lunged, over excited. It tripped, its head thumping against the pavement. It crawled in desperation towards Gabriel. He struggled to get away, his limbs flailing around. Beth backed away, the walker gained on Gabriel. He wasn't going to get away, Beth knew. She watched until the walker came onto him. Gabriel shrieked in pain as it chomped on his thigh.

Sasha broke her trance. "Beth we need to go. It's over."

She looked back. "Where's your God now, Gabriel?" She didn't know if he could hear her. It didn't matter. The God her parents taught her to worship had betrayed her. She wasn't less holy than Gabriel because she loved Tara. Gabriel was wrong. God was wrong. Their love had to be right in this wasted world full of wrongs.

Gabriel's screams stopped before they arrived back at the church. The cigarette cherries still burned in the blackness. They must have been arguing. She and Sasha slipped back into the front door. Beth went to the water supply first. Using a rag, she wiped the blood from her shoes. Sasha had disappeared.

Tara had fallen asleep, tears streaked through the blood on her face. Beth sat in a chair and contemplated. A new part of her had opened. A part of her she didn't even know existed until today. No longer did she feel held down to morals- to God's standards. He left her for dead in the dark room. He ignored her when she begged for help- laughed at her when bug legs got stuck in her teeth. Her leg bounced in frustration, the floor boards creaked. Tara sat up and rubbed her eyes awake. "Hey, how long have I been asleep?"

Beth smiled, "Not too long, I told you I'd be quick."


	22. Chapter 22

Beth smiled and sat next to her on the moth eaten sofa. The majority of Tara's face had been painted purple. The brown of her eyes could only be seen as a slit hidden under all the swelling. She winced as she yawned. "Where'd you go?"

"Nowhere," Beth changed the subject. "How's your nose?"

"My nose will be fine. Why don't you want to tell me?" Beth's lungs deflated. She did not want to talk about this. Tara's vision was not obscured enough to miss the look of pain in Beth's eyes. "I just can't, Tara."

"I'm okay with that. I trust you." Weight left the blonde's shoulders. She knew she would have to confess to her eventually. Her spirit could not take any more negativity. It simply had to wait. She upped her, "Gabriel escaped."

"He'll never make it, you know that right?"

Beth remembered him begging. "How is your nose really?" she said.

"It freaking hurts."

"Do you know how long it's gonna take to heal?"

"Dunno, Rick said a couple of days," The sooner the better in Tara's opinion. The sheriff had laid down the law too. She was not to leave the church or be on guard duty until her eyes resumed their natural skin color. She informed Beth. "He's so lame."

Beth disagreed. "Cause the two of us shacked up alone is so terrible right?" She drawled, "Practically punishment."

Tara's mouth snapped shut. "Well." She brought her hands together in a deal making fashion. "I guess it wouldn't be too terrible." Beth stood up. "Can you walk?"

"Can I walk?"

"Yeah, like with your legs?" Tara laughed, "Beth, my nose has nothing to do with my legs."

"Then let's go," She took Tara's hand and pulled her off the couch. Beth entered the chapel. Survivors were scattered about the remaining pews, though most were of in more "comfortable" rooms. She led Tara to the supplies, piling their pockets full of food and bottled water.

They made it to the attic. The coolness of the air brushed over their skin. Familiarity struck them. This was their place, no one thought of Gabriel. Tara laid on the bed, eyes shut tight in pain. "What's wrong?" Beth rushed to her side. Tara answered through gritted teeth, "Just a headache."

"Let's be still for a while, okay?"

Tara nodded. They both lay on their backs, side by side. Silence enveloped the hideaway. Beth didn't know when their hands intertwined until Tara gave her a hearty squeeze. "It's not gonna hurt forever. I'm so sorry."

Beth raised their hands to her lips. She planted a tiny circle of kisses on the top of Tara's hand. Flowers bloomed through the fog in her mind. She focused on Beth's light touches on her arms. The pain receded with the sun across the horizon. The night air chilled the attic. Tara pulled herself against Beth's burning hot skin causing the blonde to shiver. Tara apologized. "No, don't be sorry." Beth came closer. The skin above the waist of her jeans tingled at the bare contact with Tara.

The wind pushed the walls; its melody could be heard whispering through the windows. Beth wondered aloud, "I wonder what day it is."

"It's sometime in September I think."

"Oh. When did I get back?"

"July," She answered. Time was irrelevant to Beth now. She had lived day by day, minute by minute even, since it began. Her birthday is in December, she had forgotten. "When's your birthday?" Beth wanted to know.

"Actually, I think it's any day now." She paused. Tara had known Beth was young. She wasn't sure she wanted to know how young. "I'll be twenty-three." She held her breath and took in Beth's blank expression.

An eternity later, she spoke, "I'll be nineteen in December." Tara exhaled unnaturally.

"What was that for?"

Tara had been caught, she smiled in embarrassment. "Well. I… Uh," She stumbled over her words. "I had heard you were younger." The wrinkles in her face scrunched darker.

"Oh," Beth realized. "Happy almost birthday."

"Thanks." Tara's nose throbbed with steady pain. The night became old and she became more tired. Yawns made her nose sear. She shut her eyes and listened to the rhythmic thumping of Beth's heart.


	23. Chapter 23

The girls had stayed in the attic the entire next day. Beth talked mostly and Tara listened. Beth told her about her father, Hershel, and the rest of her family. Talking about them no longer made Beth sad- she no longer had time to be sad. This life was too short to spend it unhappy. Beth believed life is what you make it. Her feelings towards Tara burned in the forefront of her mind. She wanted to feel the things she had felt to try to make sense of them.

Beth could see the pale purple replaced the blackened circles under Tara's closed eyes- the crisp afternoon air relaxed her unconscious. Green eyes flashed in her mind. Red lips, curved up at the ends tempted her. The way energy surged through her when their skin touched. Tara crawled towards her across the bed, a memory. Beth reached out and opened her eyes.

Tara lay still next to her, a gentle wheeze coming from her nose. Beth sighed- Tara's nose was broken so she couldn't possibly act on her temptations. "Tara." She whispered and prodded. She got out of bed. They needed water and Beth needed to take a walk. Her boots thumped down the rungs of the ladder.

A few survivors paced around the chapel. Quick, nervous glances shot in her direction. Sasha sat alone in an empty room. "Hey," Beth said, "Have you seen Rick yet?"

"Yeah, actually. He asked if I saw anything but I told him no."

"Did he ask about me?"

"I told him you were watching Tara." Beth left without saying goodbye. She didn't want their harsh whispers to seem any more suspiscious. She gathered some water and didn't meet anyone else. Unbeknownst to Beth, Daryl stood waiting for her in the same spot that Gabriel waited for Tara. He moved from the shadows as she walked past.

Beth swung her fist striking Daryl in the lip. He started to bleed. "God damn it Beth." He spat on the wooden floor.

"What the hell Daryl? You scared the hell outta me, what'd you expect?" She added sorry right after. "Nevermind it ain't nothing," he grumbled.

"Is there any particular reason why you're standing outside of the attic?" She wasn't going to beat around the bush. The way he looked at her, black eyes piercing her existence- as though she belonged to him. Sure, Beth cared about him- she cared about him too much even. She just didn't love him. It was as simple as that to her.

The same wasn't true when it came to Daryl. He couldn't grasp how it could be possible that she plainly didn't love him. "Save it. I already told you." His eyes bore and spat, "Who ya up there in the attic with all the time, huh?" The cigarette in his mouth burned red with his anger.

Beth moved simultaneously with his words, a mere inches from his face. The smoke curled and spiraled in between their faces. In the same moment, she stole the tobacco right from his mouth. She rolled it between her long, pale fingers. She took a step back, taking a deep inhale. "These things will kill ya." She blew the toxic smoke in his face. His eyes squinted. By the time he reopened them, Beth had ascended up the ladder with his stolen cigarette.


	24. Chapter 24

The church was on fire- or at least that's what Tara thought when she woke to a horrendous smell. Her eyes darted around the room. They fell on Beth leaning against the wall by the window. She held a cigarette, the cherry burned in the dark.

Beth took short quick puffs- the nicotine made her feel swirly. It couldn't be described- Beth thought perhaps she might be taller. Her knees wobbled. By the time Beth had noticed Tara propped up on her elbows watching her with wide eyes- the feeling had gone.

Once, Tara had been driving home when a deer crossed the road. She slammed on her brakes and missed him by inches. Beth looked like that deer, Tara thought. Wide eyed and motionless, Beth watched Tara leap out of bed and stumble towards her. "Gimme that."

"What?" Tara snatched it from her fingers and brought the filter to her lips. The now twice-stolen cigarette lit up, brightening Tara's face. The small dimples on either side of Tara's mouth twitched. Her arm lowered.

Beth watched her lips push out perfect little smoke circles. She poked the circles causing them to disband to the ceiling. The delight in her voice was apparent, "Really cool." Innocence flashed, gone as fast as it had come.

Tara could imagine how everyone else saw her- delicate, a gentle flower in a world of thorns. She didn't see her like that. Beth was her equal, a survivor enduring pain day after day. "I didn't know you smoked." She asked Beth.

"Me neither." The cigarette burned to the filter. Beth let it drop to the floor, and smashed it down with her boot. The moonlight reflected off of Tara's face. Beth thought her eyebrows were fierce, that of an untamed tiger. She didn't notice the lingering bruises. Beth blinked, apparently Tara didn't notice either. She pressed herself against Beth, kissing her recklessly. Beth's breath came as jagged as the wood of the window dug into her back, though she hardly noticed. Tara's hands clutched her hips, leaning further into her.

Beth moved herself forward. The back of Tara's knees caught on the bed- she fell. Beth followed, her collarbones glistening in the moonlight. Tara licked her lips. "Picturesque."

Beth was struck. Tara hadn't said she was sexy, or beautiful. Picturesque, Beth knew. The word meant distinctive or impressive. She had remembered from school. This word may have been different and unusual, but she hadn't minded the compliment one bit. To Tara, Beth belonged in a photograph, but not in a magazine or newspaper. She grinned between kisses, knowing she was selfish enough to want Beth all to herself. Tara ran out of breath- Beth kissed up and down her neck, pausing only to gently bite at her collarbones. Heat ran through the blonde- a forest fire spreading uncontrollably. She thought of nothing other than the way Tara tasted on her tongue, the way she could feel Tara's body stiffen when her teeth found the tender flesh. Tara knew that Beth had never done this before. Neither had Tara, not like this.

Pure desire drove Beth further. Her hand traveled the valleys of Tara's back. She casually slipped her fingers under her the top of her jeans. Her fingers left a burning hot trail from back to front. Their eyes met. Ocean waves soothed the frenzied forest.

"I love you." Beth said the words without thinking. Tara went through a range of expressions. Her brow furrowed, as if she were deep in thought. Beth's fingers gave her jeans a tug. Her expression changed-her eyes full of tears though her smile was wide. "I love you too." The joyful tears fell. Beth kissed her soft and without hurry. Her lips tasted of the ocean. Their lips tangled until the tears were dry. Tara fell asleep listening to the steady rhythm of Beth's heart. Beth couldn't find sleep. Gabriel's cries rang in her ears; his face appeared every time she closed her eyes. She traced patterns over Tara's skin until the dawn


	25. Chapter 25

Rick had an announcement the next morning. Daryl and Carol had scoped out an outlet mall a couple miles from the church. Everyone was going including Tyrese and Judith. He said depending on how long it took to clear it out they may stay overnight and head back to the church the next day.

Beth looked to Tara and knew they were thinking the same thing. A night spent in close proximity to Daryl Dixon was just about as desirable as making out with a walker. Beth recalled the conversation she had with him the previous night to Tara over breakfast. He shot her fleeting glances every so often. They both ignored him.

The lack of their attention made his blood rush through his veins. How could she just ignore me? After everything they've been through. His thoughts came through choppy. Beth was wrong. He had the right to be mad at her- he loved her. Look at them, sitting there judging him. The girls sat close, laughing at something one of them had said. Laughing at him, Daryl thought.

His glass came down a little too hard on the table. The glass shattered, slicing his hand. He flicked his wrist, tiny flecks of blood splattered over the table. The pain translated to anger, "Mother fucker." He punched the wall on the way out of the chapel. Everyone turned their attention back to themselves.

Beth kept her eyes down at her plate during the scene. Tara elbowed her playfully, "You sure do know how to pick them." "Yeah," Beth said looking down again, her lips in a thin line. Feelings conflicted inside her- half of her wanted to laugh at the immaturity of the situation. The disturbed part of her wanted to follow him and make sure he was okay.

She didn't speak throughout their preparation. Tara knew Beth hadn't slept the previous night- the gloomy blonde had matching circles under her eyes. A thick layer of clouds diluted the sun, dulling its sharp gaze. Empty fields stood on each side of the narrow road. Tara and Beth walked side by side. She'll admit it- Tara purposefully brushed her hand against Beth's several times. She stared straight ahead, not noticing Tara's advances.

Tara gave up, her steps falling behind. Beth continued to stare down the road. A blanket made her limbs heavy; an invisible veil covered her face. Her head pounded with each step, her thoughts jumbled around. She couldn't think of Tara without thinking of Gabriel. She had to tell her the truth. Her mouth was dry.

Rick whistled from up ahead. Tara jogged to catch up to Beth. They reached Rick and the others. "There's too many of them to fight, but if we hide they should go right by." They were surrounded by abandoned cars, most of their doors already open.

Tara spotted a minivan with dusty windows, she pulled Beth towards it. Tara used a cloth to clean the window of the layer of dirt. It faced another vehicle. Carol appeared with a single finger held to her lips. Not a second later the first walker bumped into them, jostling the rubbish on the floor. From the sounds of quiet scraping and groaning, it was apparent the walkers traveled slowly and they were going to be here for a while.

Tara kneeled in the middle of the floor, where she could see out the window. Carol sat cross legged, her eyes shut. Her shoulders moved with each deep breath. Daryl's crossbow lay next to her. Tara stumbled forward, landing face first in the wasted paper. A morbidly obese walker must have power walked right into their van- knocking Tara on her ass, or so to speak. She got to her knees and brushed her chest off. Beth sat near the back of the van, staring straight ahead. She hadn't even noticed the fatty. Tara waved her hand in her direction, "Hello, Earth to Beth?"


	26. Chapter 26

Shadows loomed forefront everywhere she turned, a distant buzzing ran in her ears. Beth could see Tara walking next to her, but something separated them. Thick glass, muffling sight and sound, left her alone. Despair fluttered across her skin in rolling waves. She thought of the man she had killed before- the one that had brought her food.

Across the glass barrier, Tara had disappeared. Beth crumpled on the ground shaking with fear. Someone was going to hurt her. Or even worse- to starve alone on this cold floor. Cold sweats shook her to her core. She was panicking.

Crack-her ribs snapped one by one. With any tick of the second hand, her chest would burst. She bit down on her tongue until the taste of iron made her sick. Beth doubled over, gagging. Her eyes watered, she couldn't breathe. Something obstructed her airway. She gasped for air, pushing with everything she had. The obstruction hit the floor with a wet thud. An apple sized, blonde hair ball lay at her feet.

A sharp noise shot through her ear drums. The man with the hat gestured. A strong wind blew through her nostrils, bringing her favorite scent. She went towards the man, faster. She turned to Tara, keeping pace with her. Much to her surprise, Tara's hand reached for hers shattering the fog. The contact burned for a moment. She was being pulled into something. Time passed unnoticed until she became unbalanced from an unseen force.

Beth became conscious of herself. She identified this outburst as being one of the same she had when she was locked away. The lack of sleep certainly was to blame. Guilt rode heavy on her shoulders. The blood slowed with her practiced breathing. A hand waved in her face. "Hello, Earth to Beth?" Hearing Tara say her name brought her back completely. "Hey," Beth tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Hey yourself," butterflies fluttered in Tara's stomach.


	27. Chapter 27

Carol sat opposite him, silent. She hadn't said a word since the horde arrived. Daryl shook out his hands and lit a cigarette. He leaned towards a crack in the dirty window to blow his smoke out. Partial heads bobbed up and down, moving slower than molasses. His weight shifted around, the seat was too stiff.

When his cigarette was finished he slumped against the window. His eyes darted to the side mirror in time to see something incredible. A walker came out of nowhere, running like a lunatic. It slammed into the van behind him. He could see into the front window. Squinting, he spotted Tara. She was kneeling in the middle of the van. His fists clenched. He had his suspicions about her but had never investigated.

Subconsciously, Daryl did not want to know. But as he watched Tara crawl forward his worst nightmares became reality. His knuckles turned white, his dry skin cracked. He turned to see if Carol had moved- she hadn't. The window fogged with his breath. He leaned closer to the mirror to get a better look. "Fuck," He spat under his breath. No matter how hard he squinted, he couldn't see.

Daryl knew he had to see- see for himself. "Carol." Her eyes opened. He gestured to his cross bow. She slid the weapon to him and closed her eyes again. Back in the front seat, he rolled the window down. The handle squeaked with every turn. There weren't any walkers close. He propped himself out of the window, aiming the crossbow at the van behind them. His shoulders flopped down with a deep exhale. The scope focused.

The same hands that ran through his hair now gripped Tara's. He bit down on his tongue until it bled. They moved, he lowered the weapon and searched around. Walkers slouched towards them, but he had another moment. He readjusted the bow, hoping he was hallucinating. The straps of her tank top hung on her shoulders. He followed her collarbones up to her face. Her tongue licked Tara's bottom lip. He slid back in the vehicle, revolted.

"On second thought," He leaned out of the window and looked down his sights. Daryl's vision tunneled, red rimmed. His jealousy sent the arrow flying through the air.


	28. Chapter 28

Tara tangled her fingers in blonde hair- eliciting moans with each tug. The taste of Beth's lips left Tara frenzied. Her thoughts were nonexistent as fingernails trailed their way down her stomach.

Beth felt the flat, muscular planes under Tara's shirt. She shuddered, her nails digging deeper into the tender skin. Tara couldn't wait anymore. She wanted Beth, all of her. Though she had thought this moment before- the electricity surging through her veins couldn't be imagined. Tara never wanted to forget this feeling. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, taking the moment in.

A cool breeze pushed her hair to the side, giving her goose bumps. She came back to see a wide-eyed Beth. Her blue eyes were panicked- a stormy ocean. In another moment Beth raised her hands to cover her open mouth, she was looking at something. Tara turned the other direction- a sleek arrow was stuck inches from her in the wall of the van. She followed the trail with her eyes, finding where the arrow pierced the windshield. Her vision focused past the spider web splintered glass.

An earlier memory flashed in her thoughts, as if the shiny arrow wasn't clue enough. "Son of a bitch," Tara spat. Beth sat still- frozen. She didn't know what to do. The gears whirred in her head. Her reaction wasn't even close to decided when she heard the van door crash open. Tara burst out of the van, gun in hand. She walked around, searching for Daryl. Three walkers separated them. Tara sauntered forward, only pulling her trigger three times.

Beth leapt from the van, along with everyone else, at the sound of muffled gun shots. Tara moved fast, not shouting until within earshot. "Do you have a fucking problem?" She shook with rage, "Huh?" Tara slammed both fists onto the trunk beside her.

The others gathered round, creating a tight circle around the three. "You inbred motherfucker, answer me!" He stepped from the shadows, his crossbow aimed at her chest. "Put down your weapon."

"Yeah- how about you go fuck yourself." His voice got louder, "I said- put it down."

"No way," Tara countered, "considering you just tried to fucking kill me." A gasp came from an unknown source. Tara set her knife and gun down on the trunk with a clang. She rushed towards Daryl, not having an immediate plan. He was so shocked he didn't even see her right hook until it connected with his mouth. Tara felt his lip burst beneath her knuckles. His crossbow fell to the wayside, and he shoved a still swinging Tara away from him.

"Stop it," Beth cried, "both of you!"

Tara was still too angry. "He tried to kill me a second ago, you were there." She spit on the ground in his direction. He looked at Beth with pitiful eyes. "Don't you fucking look at her, I'm still talking." Tara grabbed her weapons. "Now, what's your fucking problem?" She pointed the gun at him. His sights were on her, though he lacked an answer to her question. "Nothing?" She paced, "Oh, I'm the only one that knows, is that it?"

Beth silently begged her to stop talking. Daryl threw his arms around Tara, knocking her to the ground. The two scuffled until Rick and Carol pulled them apart. Tara was livid, even Rick had a hard time keeping her back. She yelled a string of curse words in his direction, still struggling against Rick's strong arms, until Daryl spoke. "I loved her first."

Tara stopped resisting and spoke in a cool, even voice. "I love her better."

The thought of them two made the man cringe. He racked his brain for something, anything he could say to make her shut up. Daryl remembered his stolen cigarette and knew what he was going to say, "Why don't you ask her what happened to Gabriel?" Beth's heart stopped, her breathing stopped, everything stopped. Daryl hadn't known. He couldn't possibly know, could he? "Tell 'em, Beth," Daryl growled. She still couldn't speak; she didn't know what to say.

"He escaped," Carol stepped forward, a voice of reason. "Right, Beth?" All she could do was nod. Rick threw the arrow at his feet. Daryl spat and lit a cigarette. "What's this about Daryl?" Rick questioned.

The conversation had shifted away from that night, and Beth found her voice. "We had sex."


	29. Chapter 29

"We had sex."

Fabric rustled as every head turned in her direction. She repeated, "We had sex one time when we were drunk."

Tara chimed in, "But she doesn't want you any more asshole."

She used to care about him, but that stopped as soon as his arrow pieced their window. Beth placed a calming hand on Tara's chest, "She's right. I'm sorry Daryl but I don't love you." Anger rose through her, "I don't know how else to tell you. I would spell it out for you, but I don't even know if you can read."

Rick put his hands up to cease the fighting. Carl asked, "But what does this have to do with Tara?"

There was no way out of this one. They had to tell them. Beth and Tara's fingers intertwined and they spoke in unison, "We love each other."

Carl laughed, "I always wondered what you two were doing up in the attic all the time."

His father spoke again, "Now Daryl, just because you're jealous doesn't mean you can shoot Tara in the head."

He interrupted, "I wasn't tryna kill her. Best believe if I wanted to I wouldn't have missed."

"Either way," Rick continued, "Don't do it again. Now we need to get a move on, the sun is already low. Let's go."

Night fell fast on the group. Twigs snapped excitedly in the forest on either side of the highway. They remained close; eyes darting, searching for a threat. Tension filled the humid air. Mosquitos buzzed in clouds above them. Tara slapped her hand to where they ate her neck. The whole group turned to face her. "Sorry"

Beth chuckled beside her and Tara thought it was the most beautiful sound she had ever heard. Love washed over her skin. When everyone turned their attention elsewhere, Tara pulled on Beth's hand stopping their slow steps.

"What's wrong?" Beth asked as Tara threw her arms over her. The strength of Tara's muscles made butterflies dance around in her stomach.

''Nothing."

Beth could see tears ready to fall from her brown eyes.

"I just love you, that's all."

Beth's grin lit up the night. ''I love you too, Tara."

They kissed under the starlight and in that moment the girls forgot the evil in the world. They had forgotten about the flesh eating monsters that would surely devour them if they weren't careful. "We should catchup." The two lovebirds hustled back to the others.

The strip mall loomed on the horizon. Walkers were scattered through out the abandoned lot. They spread out, staying in pairs. Tara crept a step behind Beth. Her head turned with every noise. Twisted heaps of metal sat still and scrotched. A slimy hand emerged from the metal. "Shit,'' It tore her jacket, ripping her skin. If she pulled, a part of her arm would stay behind.

"Hold still." Beth raised her axe above her head. Tara closed her eyes as Beth's arms came swinging down. A sick squish opted Tara to open her eyes. A rotted hand clung to her forearm. She went to work prying the dead fingers. Three of four broke off. They left the walker, not bothering to search the heated metal for its brain.

She and Tara kept watch while Rick and the others cleared the buildings. A walker crawled towards them- its intestines slowly dragging behind. Beth brought her boot to its forehead, easily breaking its skull. She wiped her dirty boot on its filthy shirt. Beth flashed back to when she had cleaned Gabriel's blood from her boots. His cries rang through her mind.

Tara's words brushing her ear brought her back. "You're so sexy when you're stomping in brains."

She turned quickly, capturing Tara's lips. "Oh, really now?" Beth drawled, pulling away. Two More dead men approached.

''Oh my god," Tara exclaimed at the 7 foot giant coming right for them. Beth sprang into action, "The big ones slow, let's get his friend first." She ran at him, Tara following close behind. The force of her foot in his chest pushed him flat on his back. Tara swooped in shoving her knife into the mushy head.

The giant came faster, excited at the commotion. "Fuck," Tara muttered, "what's the plan ace?"

Beth surveyed the area, finding what she needed. She sprinted, her blood rushed. "Keep him coming towards you," She called over her shoulder. Her curved path landed her behind the giant. Beth positioned herself, flexing her grip on her axe. Tara's taunts faded to silence as her vision narrowed. She started running.


	30. Chapter 30

"Come here fucker," Tara banged her fist on the metal door. She watched Beth run around the walker. The giant was close enough to be heard by Tara. She backed up instinctively. He snarled at her, getting close. Beth's head bobbed between cars. She was out of sight. Tara could smell the rotting flesh. Panic ensued. The giant was too close-Beth needed to hurry.

Beth had to time this perfect-she only had one chance. She climbed into the back of a pickup. Gracefully, she jumped from the cab to a van. He could be seen over the edge of the vehicle. Tara was there too, panic fresh in her face. Beth soared through the air, an eagle in flight. Her axe stuck the big man's head, splitting it down to his torso. The wind rushed from her as her body slammed against his. Gravel scraped off patches of her skin as she bounced across the black top. Tara dodged the falling body, but not far enough away to not get covered in moldy, moist chunks of dead flesh. She wiped off her face. Beth peeled herself off of the cement and Tara was instantly at her side. Tara ripped her sleeve and pressed the clean side against Beth's bloody cheek. ''Ouch," she winced, sucking in air through clenched teeth. They stood, Beth stretching her limbs to see what hurt the worst. The raw, burning skin on her face was the worst of her injuries. Michonne crossed the lot, gliding between cars with absolute precision. She floated towards them- her face expressionless. "What's the word?" Tara asked as she became within earshot.

"The building is clear. What happened here?" Michonne pushed the toe of her boot into the fallen giant's head, separating the halves farther apart. Beth looked away, "Is everyone else okay?"

"For the most part, yes, just scrapes and bruises... much like yourself,"

She moved closer to Beth, observing her wounds. "We should get going before Rick sends that dog out here looking for us." She winked, letting the girls know she was on their side.

The outer walls were secure. Four stores side by side made up the inside. Cages covered the entire buildings front. A single thick metal door stood in back of each store, the only access to the outside. The first store was a skeleton of its former glory. Scavengers picked the majority of the shelves clean of anything useful. The stores were interconnected, Tara realized as they stepped through another doorway. Metal on metal screeched, Carol was already flicking through the abandoned clothing racks. Most spilled over, a fabric layer on the floor. The signs informed them of the second clothing options. Beth looked down to her potato sack outfit. The fabric felt rough on her skin, worn and stiff. She stopped walking eager to start searching.

Michonne spoke, "I think you'll want to see what's in room number three." Beth exhaled, impatient. Tara tugged on her hand and they walked into the next room. Their feet splashed with every step. Glass tanks lined up in rows, most broken. Rick peered over a large tub in the very back of the store. Tara and Beth glanced around the remaining tanks. Beth raised her finger, tapping the cloudy glass. She jumped back with a fish splashed among the opaque algae. Tara giggled, and Beth smacked her arm playfully. Daryl walked by, sending chills up both of the girls spines. Whether or not he meant to shoot Tara in the head was irrelevant. He pulled the trigger- that was enough. Beth knew they were safe. While Tara trusted Beth's judgments, she couldn't help but look over her shoulder when he was around. "I wasn't impressed," Beth said stepping into the final room. "Oh my goodness," she exhaled, "You definitely saved the best for last, Michonne." They looked upon a sea of furniture- bunk beds, couches, futons. Carl swiveled in an armchair to their right. "Isn't this awesome? I've never had so many seating options!" A child of the apocalypse, he lived more of his conscious life in it than not. Michonne tried to secretly wipe her tears. She had come to really care for the young man. She was joyful to see him so happy.

Beth and Tara dismissed themselves and meandered throughout the store. The sales floor held all sorts of furniture- some comfortable, some tacky. Tara flopped on the bed, her hair spread out behind her. Beth followed, lying on her stomach. "How about this one?" Tara asked. "Hmm. Let's keep looking."

Tara grunted as she got up, her legs hurt and all she wanted to do was lay down. Beth had disregarded every piece of furniture they had come across thus far. "You're lucky you're cute," Tara said, pulling Beth farther through the store. A partition separated the sales floor from the store room. Mattresses sat in piles throughout the smaller room. Tara walked up to the massive heap. She wasn't interested in the stack of beds but more so the door next to it. The knob turned and she swung the door open. Beth stood behind her in the doorway looking over her shoulder at the tiny office before them. She urged Tara into the tiny room and the door clicked shut. "Perfect," Beth thought out loud. Tara had no idea what was going on. It seemed to her that Beth was on some sort of sleep deprived whirlwind. She pulled the door open too enthusiastically and sped out of the room. Tara stood dumbfounded, too exhausted to react. Where Beth had all this energy she did not know, but she wished the blonde would share with her. Speak of the Devil, Beth's head poked back in the door. "Are you coming?"

Twenty minutes, a splinter, and dozens of various groans from Tara later, Beth stood way of the office door. She pushed it opened about a foot before the door stuck on an obstacle. "Ta da!" She exclaimed after Tara had squeezed through the small opening. A bed filled the entire room. Tara had already known as she had helped the small girl pull the bed into the room, but it was still nice to see how happy she was at her idea. "And the best part," she said as Tara plopped down on the bed. Beth gestured to the door knob, "There's a lock." She crawled across the bed, still smiling at the simple happiness of it all. Exhaustion set in as her whirlwind came to a halt. With the last of her energy, she leaned over and kissed an already sleeping Tara. Beth fell back on the mattress and closed her eyes.


	31. Chapter 31

A/N: I am so sorry I haven't posted in a few days. My laptop took a poop but it's fixed now. Thanks for reading.

**The door handle wiggled reluctantly and Beth shot awake. She unlocked and slipped through the small opening. Tara did not stir at her departure. She breathed deeply, her arm stretched out across the empty bed. Carol waited for Beth to slip out of the office before making her presence known. The dead of night shadows cast upon Carol, exaggerating the dark circles under her eyes. She pushed the plate she held towards Beth. "Here." **

**Several large pieces of fish lay in a pile, the grease soaking through the bottom. "Thank you," Beth glanced up from the food. Carols mouth was a thin line, and her eyes darted away from Beth's. "What's wrong, Carol?"**

**She exhaled and shook her head, "Nothing."**

**Beth knew, she always knew. "If this is about Daryl, I'm sorry." **

**Carols hand sharply grabbed her arm, almost knocking the fish from her hand. And just like that, Carol disappeared from the store room.**

**Beth plopped down on the bed disregarding Carol's odd behavior for now. She suspected once the truth came out there had to at least be repercussions with her. Her stomach grumbled and she had chewed through two mouthfuls before she remembered Tara beside her. She shook Tara roughly awake. Tara stirred, not wanting to wake up. "Food," Beth said one simple word, not wasting any time between chewing. Tara's abs clenched as she shot forward, sitting up. The girls devoured the food, thankful for what was in room number three.**

**Rick decided they should stay at the mall until they ran out of fish as it could not be taken with them. Tara thought maybe the beds in the furniture store held something more than church pews and dusty attics, too. They worked securing the cages in the front of the mall. Tara worked while Beth spent the day admiring the curvature of her love's muscles as she carried the heavy planks of wood around. Sweat soaked through her shirt in the beginning hours of her work. Tara's loose tank top fluttered, revealing flashes of delicate skin. Despite not doing any work, Beth began to sweat too.**

**She watched Beth watch her for most of the morning. Tara felt powerful glimpsing Beth subconsciously fan herself off after an especially dense piece of lumber. The lock on their office door lingered in the back of her mind. Snarls snapped her back to reality, a walker hobbled by not noticing her kneeling next to the cage. Tara turned to see Beth, licking her lips like a predator before a meal. The brunette's mind was not the only one that wandered back to the office. Beth wanted to check out the clothing store as soon as their work was done. **

**Carl brought them fish and news around lunch time, "I'll tell my dad your cage looks good. I'll check again, but I think that's all the work for today." He talked to Beth, but Tara answered him. "How about you don't check?" He nodded and excused himself. During the walk back to Rick, he thought about the past. Hershel's farm, the most distinct memories involving a certain blonde. She was his school girl crush- he couldn't imagine them ever actually getting together. A boy can dream though. **

**Screams of metal filled the still air. Beth shoved hangers aside, searching for anything practical to wear. She tilted her head at the article- not cute enough, next. Her eyes flickered to her company. Sasha and Carol browsed, orbiting around each other. Occasionally one of them would wander off to the fitting rooms for a small amount of time. No one talked, Beth noticed. She herself hadn't spoken to Sasha since that night. Beth wanted to talk to her, to thank her for her secrecy. She knew her and Tara were close before, but not so much anymore. Murder wedged them apart. Carol strolled over to the fitting rooms, disappearing. Beth saw her chance, she swooped in next to her. Sasha rolled her eyes, "Have you told her yet, blondie?" **

**Beth frowned, not expecting this right off the bat. "No, but I will."**

**"****You need to, before someone else tells her." Sasha whispered short and harsh. "I heard Daryl before you dropped the sex bomb on everyone- which, by the way, is that true?" **

**"****Never mind that," Beth shoved the hangers her way.**

**Carol emerged from the dressing room, arms full of clothes, and left the store. Sasha concluded, "Either way, you need to tell her soon Beth. He'll figure it out, and don't think for a second he won't ruin your relationship."**

**"****Fine," Beth didn't like being told what to do. Her boots hit the floor hard as she sauntered to the dressing rooms. She tried on a number of things, leaving the rejects in a pile on the floor. A couple of outfits won her approval- she put them in her back pack and headed to the office. **


	32. Chapter 32

Beth found Tara leaning over the edge of the tank. She put her hands over the unsuspecting eyes, "Guess who?"

"Uh, Carl?" Tara laughed when Beth smacked her playfully on the back. They shared a short kiss before Tara turned back to tank. Fish swam, synchronized around the water. She handed a net to Beth, "The tanks run on a powerless filtration system. Once we move the fish, the water will clean itself," Tara stuck her net in, catching a few unsuspecting fish. They splashed around, breathless, until she released them into their new home. She finished her thought, "And since I'm moving the fish, I get first dibs on the clean water."

"All you have to do is move them?" Beth smirked.

"Yeah, and dispose of any debris we may find then the water's ours."

Beth shoved her net into the school. The fish panicked, swimming haphazardly into Tara's awaiting net. One of the larger fish jumped from the water, splashing Beth. The water was warmer than any she had for a long time- cleaner too, fish or no fish. She sized the tub, two people could fit inside. Two people that wouldn't mind being close, she decided. There would be no way they could bathe together- no privacy what so ever. She would hate for Daryl or anyone else to wander through. Not unless there were nothing to see. She called over her shoulder as she ran from the room, "I'll be right back. I love you."

"I love you too," Tara replied knowing Beth couldn't hear her. She could practically hear the gears whirring as she left the room. Her heart fluttered, she knew Beth would be back soon. Tara went to work catching fish, the sooner this thing was empty, the better. She yearned to be clean. Her hand came to her nose, massaging the still tender bridge. Ever since it had been broken, it ached with bitterness every so often. Tara was grateful Gabriel had escaped without hurting anyone else. She felt guilty hoping he was out there, his undying corpse roaming the streets, never finding peace. Beth never spoke of the night, of what else happened in the dark attic. The thought of him harming Beth was revolting. Anger swelled inside of her, sending a foul taste to her tongue. The balloon of negative emotion deflated when she caught sight of Beth walking towards her, arms full.

"I have solved our little bathing dilemma," Beth scattered the findings over the table besides them. "Might I ask what dilemma you're talking about?"

"Well since Daryl almost put an arrow in your head last time he saw us together- I thought maybe we shouldn't lounge around in this tub naked, for everyone, including him to see." She sorted the matching bathing suits according to color. "Not that I mind, the nudity that is," her pale skin blushed and goose bumps spread across her arms. "But I think Carol and Rick would be a bit upset if we killed him, heart attack or otherwise."

Tara liked where this idea was headed, but she had another idea. "Not to one up you or anything, cause your plan is brilliant," She turned the tags, searching for her most approximate size. "I think I can hang a sheet from the furniture store up from the ceiling," she saw the ceiling tiles supports, which would work just fine. "More for our sake, I definitely do not want to see any man junk any time soon. Or ever- thanks."

Beth's mention of nudity ignited Tara's blood, making her warm all over. Even more eager to remove the fish, she rotated her net expertly catching a few of the remaining survivors. Beth brought back the sheet and word of a dinner to be held this evening. "Guess what's on the menu?"

"Rhymes with dish?" Tara had never really been a fan of seafood, or things that smelled of fish. She didn't really have a choice though. Hunger for things like cheeseburgers and French fries always ebbed away at her psyche. Today she hadn't felt hungry though- that was different. She gave a silent thank you as she swooped catching the final three fish all at once.

Tara wished she could have shot an arrow at Daryl for every single fleeting glance he sent their way at dinner. Her foot tapped the floor incessantly, annoyed at his very existence. A stupid pride thing, she was jealous of him. Logically, she shouldn't have been. Beth had clearly picked her, not him. Tara was a stranger, the enemy even, when they had met. She could have just as easily fallen back to Daryl's familiar arms. That should have been easier for the psychologically suffering blonde. Instead, much to Tara's surprise, she went down the uncharted path. It was hard enough finding a decent girl pre-apocalypse- after all Hell broke loose, she thought she was doomed to spend eternity alone. Not any more, Tara would never leave Beth's side.

Plates passed left to right. People ate and drank merrily. Tyreese and Sasha partnered up to do rounds in between courses. The security of the building was essential. "Too many mistakes were made, too many lives lost," Rick would say. Leadership wore lines in his face, deep dark circles under his eyes. He thought he had lost focus back at the church. In his mind Beth's attack was his fault- he was too hard on himself. Tonight he smiled. Tonight he smiled and his heart opened up. Maybe it was the fish, or maybe it was the king size bed he slept in. He had learned, the tides could change at any moment.


	33. Chapter 33

CHAPTER 33

Michonne and Tara's conversation flew right over Beth's blonde head. She had no knowledge of hockey or anything cold, the south had been her home her entire life. While they talked of pucks, her mind wandered off to the bath water. The tub would surely be filtered of any fish residue by now. She could feel the clean water wash over her skin. Tonight is the night, she thought to herself. Beth closed her eyes and let the imaginary water wash over her. Tara yammered on about things she didn't care about, but Beth listened anyways. Her velvety smooth voice could make the most ordinary words send shivers over Beth. She hated the clichéd, "I've never felt anything like this before," Though it is true for her- especially because Tara is more complex than those boys. She was a fascinating puzzle, never ending. Beth knew she had never felt this before. She would bet her favorite horse that no one had felt like this, ever. Everyone who had claimed it were rotten liars.

Chairs scraped backwards, Tara and Michonne got to their feet. Beth's eyes shot open and she rushed to catch up. She walked behind them- they talked fast, paying no mind to her. They lead her through the door to the tank room. Beth felt the tub calling for her, she yearned to answer it. When Michonne and Tara continued through to the clothing store, Beth spoke up, "Where are we going?"

"You'll see," Michonne turned for a moment and silence ensued. Carol continued to browse even though this fall's line was never going to come out. Beth looked away when she made eye contact with her. Their last interaction was more than weird. She didn't feel any sympathy for Carol. Beth knew she was going to have to tell him how she felt. He definitely was not going to figure it out himself. Daryl Dixon couldn't take a hint if it was a walker gnawing his leg off. She thought about how she had provoked him. Whatever, Beth thought, it's not my problem. He had been avoiding them and to be honest, she'd like to keep it that way.

They walked into the vacant store. Exhaustion and sore feet were the only thing she remembered about this place. Most of the shelves were bare, though a few boxes lingered here and there. Michonne led them expertly to the back of the store. She knelt, rummaging through something with her back to Beth and Tara. "A gift for you two," Michonne presented soap, a semi-clean towel, and a glass bottle of clear brown liquid.

"Wow, thank you," Tara took the treasure, "Where did you find this stuff?"

"Oh, I will never reveal my sources," her face suddenly serious. Tara stammered, apologizing for over stepping. Michonne laughed, "I'm only joking, I went through a couple of cars in the parking lot."

Beth hurried through the mall, dragging Tara by the hand behind her. She was sure to grab the bikinis on their way. The office door stuck throwing her off balance. "Oh," Beth exclaimed, twisting towards the floor. Her body came to a halt within inches of the hard ground. In all the excitement, her legs had turned to the consistency of gelatin. Beth bit her cheek, "You go change first alright?" It wasn't a question. She needed a minute to compose herself.

Tara wasn't an idiot, Beth is obviously nervous, and rightly so. It was hard to admit, but some nerves mixed in with her desire. Just as in the Old World, the apocalypse was not favorable to the lesbian dating pool. Sometimes people need love- and stimulation.

Bikini tying by candle light was proving difficult, if not impossible. She fumbled with the strings, growing frustrated. Tara stomped her foot, telling her to get her shit together. Successful this time, she had completed the task and fled the office like a gazelle fleeing the watering hole.

The door clicked open and Tara dashed by. Beth turned, but she was gone. Oh boy, she thought to herself. She waited until she was inside a private setting until she lost her shit. Her knees hit the ground as her lungs pushed out an overwhelming breath. What was she about to do? Beth knew how this would end. Well, if it ended how she wanted it to end. A few encouraging insults later she stood up. The reminder motivated her to get changed.

The familiarity of tying the strings must have felt like how Glenn feels about that old guitar. These were her kind of strings. They took her back to the lake on her property. The hours spent with the sun biting her back- swimming without a care for hours on end. If she had known Tara then, would she still feel this way?

_You can't think like that. _Those times don't matter now. Today matters, because there's no telling if you have a tomorrow. People said that before, but don't buy it. The life expectancy plummets when shit hits the fan. Beth hustled around, looking for her towel. The candle flame bit at her side for she had come too close. Her reaction away blew out the candle. "Oh no," she said to no one in particular.

Her mind paced patterns into the floor even though she stood stationary. Chewing excitedly on her cheek, the worst possible scenarios played over and over in her mind. Beth fell into a spiral of panic and worry. The dark wasn't helping her spastic breaths. She closed her eyes, trying to get a hold on herself. Blackness everywhere, she couldn't picture anything or anyone. Beth grunted desperate to escape from the dark. The room filled with invisible water. _What way was the door? _

Beth only had one opportunity to find the door before she would be consumed by her panic attack. She thought for five seconds and pushed herself towards the door- hopefully.


End file.
